Christmas Eve

I slept well last night, about 9 hours, which is not bad when you consider I went to bed early too. I was in bed by 9:30 pm and asleep a short time after that. When I got up this morning, I was not quite done sleeping, but I had to get up on time and be functioning, because my sister and I were going grocery shopping early to avoid the crowds. Well, the whole neighborhood must have had the same idea, because there was already a crowd when we got there. So, we got our trolleys and split up and did our shopping and met again at the cash registers. I thought I had spent too much money, but the total wasn't as bad as I had anticipated, which was a relief. I had bought some extras because of the holidays, because you do have to get into the swing of things a little bit and I had to buy food for Joost, who is going to be here the day after Christmas. He does have a healthy appetite.

After I got home and had unloaded everything, and had eaten breakfast, I went back to bed and slept for another two hours, because I just couldn't wait to do that and while I was waiting for my sister to come and pick me up earlier, I had almost fallen asleep on the sofa. I think it's because I'm back on my old dose of antipsychotics again, but I'd rather be sleepy than paranoid and, let's face it, that's what I was yesterday. As a matter of fact, I just had to call for a new recipe for them, because I didn't realize I was almost out of them and I got my psychiatrist on the line and I told him I was taking three tablets and he didn't complain about it or protest. He's leaving it up to me, which I think is pretty decent of him. I do have to learn my own lessons, after all, and not climb in the phone to him every time something is wrong.

So, today I have to finish cleaning the apartment. I have to get on my knees and scrub the kitchen floor, especially the area where the animals always eat. It's pretty messy there. You can tell it has not been cleaned for awhile. I've got a great scrub sponge, though, that works wonders. It and a little elbow grease will take care of it. Plus lots of sudsy warm water, of course. I'm a great believer in that and it feels good to put your hands in.

I also have to walk the dog again and I hope he forgets it for just a while, because I'm not quite ready yet. I'd like one more cup of coffee before I really get started. I so need that. And I would like to drink a tall glass of juice, because I'm very thirsty, so I suppose I'll have that first.

I just noticed that a cat barfed under the coffee table, so that will be my first clean up job. Oh, aren't I lucky? Fortunately, I have lots of paper towels.

I am most definitely not in the same mood I was in yesterday and I can only assume it is because of the medication and it seems to me that I have tried to do with less before and that it didn't work out then either. I said at the time, that I would never decrease the amount again, but for some reason I had forgotten that or I thought it was necessary. I must remember not to do this, but to stick to this dose no matter what. Even if it does make me sleepy and a bit flat emotionally. It is preferable to how I felt yesterday, which was just awful and not at all the way I would want to go through life. I seemed to have forgotten my common sense and my optimism and I could only see the dark side of things and be suspicious of everything and everybody. What sort of an attitude is that?

Well, I must end this now. All sorts of duties call me. I'm sitting on the edge of my seat getting ready to do them.

Have a good day!

Ciao,
Nora