When are we getting started?

Jesker is laying here by my feet, sound asleep and snoring, so I will start this post and see how far I get into it. He is a strange fellow, because all he did was a little piddle out back, as if he was saving the rest for a larger outing. It's old age that makes sleep happen to him at the drop of a hat and has him awake again soon enough, ready to go. It's almost like he is narcoleptic, the way he falls asleep in mid sentence.

I slept like a log again as usual. I'm such a good sleeper nowadays and that is after taking a nap on the sofa while I try to watch the news. Luckily, the news is on a few times at night, so if I miss it once, I get to see it at another time, but it is all bad, so I'm not sure if I want to watch it at all. It said last night that Ireland was especially hit hard by the economic crisis and the poor Irish people are having a heck of a hard time. I suppose I'll consider myself lucky then, no matter how expensive life is getting.

I've cut back my Oxazepam from four times a day to three times a day. I just spread it out over longer periods of time. So far that seems to be working fine and I'm less tired during the day. As usual, I haven't discussed this with anybody and won't until next Tuesday when I see my SPN. I like to do these things on my own for whatever reason, probably because I don't want to be discouraged and I am stubborn.

I've also dropped my dance therapy. Doing that right after ergo therapy proved to be too much of a good thing and I found out that I did much better without it. That leaves me with four half days of therapy and I think that is enough. I do need some time on my own and some time to do other things. I don't always want to be committed to something, although it's nice to regularly go somewhere and do something useful, as long as it doesn't leave me feeling exhausted.

Another thing I think I've noticed is, that when my mood is about to change, I become very tired and need to sleep a lot during the day. The only thing I can't remember is what my mood is like during the sleepy period. I know I became hypomanic after it, but what was I before it? Do any of you remember that? I just remember being very sleepy. I suppose I should read my own posts and find out.

Oh, for goodness sake, I just got an email from the Exfactor. He is back from his vacation and is coming by tomorrow to bring me the money I lend him. I have very ambivalent feelings about that. I didn't really miss him while he was gone. I thought it was more than okay, it was kind of nice. Oh, well.

To get rid of my frustrations, I'm going to clean house now. There are always jobs to do and it will be good for me.

Have a good day.

Ciao...