Monday, February 09, 2009
After having written such a phenomenal post yesterday morning, I can now only write a humble little post, because time limits me and, of course, we have that thing called inspiration and I haven't looked yet to see if I have any. I was busy on Facebook and becoming a bit frustrated with things there that did not go the way I wanted them to. Aren't there always bugs in the system that you want to iron out and for which you know there should be an easy solution? Hmmm, ironed out bugs, now that would be a treat! Nice and crispy or steamed?
It figures that on the day that I have to go somewhere, I don't sleep late and wake up two hours before the alarm clock is supposed to go off. I'm not complaining about that, au contraire, it is kind of convenient, because it allows me some time to sit here and get my daily dose of caffeine in before the real work starts. Writing a post is a good way to start the day also, because it helps me set the tone of the day and helps me decide how feisty I will be.
Last week I had forgotten to put out the trash, so last night I put out two trash bags, plus the green container which is always filled with coffee pads, there is hardly ever any vegetable matter in it or any garden waste. The trash bags are large and I walk around the apartment and look for junk that can go to fill up the bag completely. That way I get a cleaner apartment and a fuller trash bag. Slowly but surely I want to get rid of all obsolete items in all the drawers and bookcases so that there is a minimum amount of junk I have to live with. It's my goal in life to be junk free by next year. Hurray!
You forget that when you live by yourself, you are in charge of that, you alone decide what you keep and what is purely junk that is laying around doing nothing but gathering dust and taking up space. It is a very liberating thought once it hits you. I have to keep reminding myself that I am entitled to do this. That I am the mistress over all that is here.
I have never been my own mistress. I have always been somebody's child or girlfriend or wife. I have been somebody's wife for a very long time. Twice. I liked none of those roles as much as I like being my own mistress, but I never would have believed it if you had said it to me a year ago. I would have shuddered at the thought.
So, anyway, I have a dresser with 7 drawers and it has been cleaned out now several times and things have been taken out and thrown away, but still there are items in there that are taking up space and that are completely useless, so I know that I will have another look through all the drawers and toss away more things.
I try not to be sentimental about things and hold on to them for emotional reasons, I dislike that very much. but I do keep some items for their remembrance factor. However, there only need to be a few things of the person I want to remember, or of an era I want to remember. I don't need loads of memorabilia. If I can fit it into one small box, then that's okay with me.
Look at me, of on a tangent, all because of the notion of trash. That's because for the last 37 years, I have lived with people who were hoarders and who never threw anything away. Everything was sacred, even the tiniest little incomprehensible part of whatever it had originally belonged to. If, on top of that, you spend a lot of that time being depressed, the volume of it becomes incomprehensible to you too and you can't see the forest for the trees. You take it as a given that you are surrounded by all these objects and you think it somehow has value and that it is necessary to the survival of the household.
Well, you can imagine that I am now going to live the stripped down version of that. I'd like to be like a turtle and carry my house on my back.
I also see on the clock that I need to get going, because I have creative therapy this morning.
So I wish you all a very good day.