Thursday, January 23, 2014

Living in the moment, yes sir.

I do well being up this late at night. This is when I am really bright eyed and bushy tailed. It turns out that I am a nighttime person and so my true nature is revealed. By the time everybody else is sound asleep, I am ready to party. Well, you should take that with a grain of salt, because I am not really a party animal.
I am not the crotchety person that I am during the day anyway, which is also a new phenomenon. But I do think it is becoming of my age and I plan to grow into this new character trait gracefully. I will tenderly hug it to my chest and cherish it. Any new development is worth taking good care of. It's been such a long time since I got to experience one.
Being negative in an optimistic way is a fine art that needs to be carried out with finesse. All the little details need to be paid attention to in order to perfect them. You can't just be crotchety in an imperfect all encompassing manner and you can't be the victim of your own attitude. You need to aim your darts carefully and timely and always be prepared. You do want to get the most joy out of them.
I only half jokingly write this and I am more serious than I am not. I don't want to turn into a kindly old woman who loves puppies and little babies. I want to be a tough old broad because I think I will last longer that way. I think anybody who makes it past 90, must have an enormous egocentric streak. I know I have that tendency myself and I am planning on developing it further.
I do have to admit, though, that not being crotchety at the moment is a nice break, but then again, it is easy not to be because I am all on my own here in the dark cozy living room by the light of the desk lamp. There isn't a soul around to do battle with and I'm not going to be crotchety in this post, although there may be times to come when I will be. In a way, I am looking forward to it.
It's so satisfying to also have an other sort of attitude at your disposal and to not always have to be the same monotonous person day in day out. I never want to get bored with myself and would always make sure that I would not be by looking for some new angle to blow life into my personality. Maybe I have more control over events than I think I do and they are not just up to fate. I wonder how much of the timing I have in my own hands?

1 comment:

Z said...

Brilliant post, made me grin! I'd like to go down the kindly route on the whole, having had a mother who became increasingly hard to live with and whose death, I'm sorry to say, none of my children much mourned. But secretly, I'm a tough old broad at heart. When I seem like a pushover, it's because I haven't bothered to shove right back yet. When I do, it's generally effective.