...and what else do I have to say?

The good news is that there has not been a mouse in the apartment yet. At least, the cat has neglected to bring one in today to play with much to my relief. She could have done it easily while I was taking a nap, but luckily she was bright enough not to do such a foolish thing. I would not have forgiven her quickly. 

There is no bad news, unless you count the fact that I've only had one cup of coffee and that I'm not going to have another one unless I make another pot of it. I'm undecided if I will do that. I need the caffeine because my brain is not functioning optimally yet. I'm still stuck in the drowsy setting.

I'm wearing a tunic that has been hanging in my closet for a long time, but that I had not worn yet because it was too small. Much to my relief, it fit me today and I'm proudly showing off my svelte body in it. It's tight fitting and made of stretch material and I really feel daring in it. I'm glad I rediscovered it. 

I've made that other pot of coffee and am drinking a cup of it now. I slowly am getting unstuck from the drowsy setting. There's something to be said for a fresh pot of coffee. It does work miracles. 

*

I just walked the dog in the still warm evening air. It smelled like blossoming things and there was lots of pollen in the mild breeze. If I were really allergic to stuff, I would be in much worse shape now. The conclusion is that I'm not and that I only have eczema. That's bad enough, of course, but it's nothing compared to what people go through who have hay fever and asthma. 

I have to look through my closet to see what other clothes are going to fit me and what is too big. I'll have some sorting to do. It is with a certain amount of pleasure that I'll do this. I'm going to do that next, as soon as I'm done writing this. 

Oh yes, I forget that I have to eat some dinner first. That is important. I would forget something like that. No problem, something is easily microwaved. Isn't that the best invention ever? It's perfect when you live on your own and you need to make only one portion. 

Have a good evening and enjoy the weather. 

Ciao,

Nora

...and what do I know, after all?

Don't believe me when I say that the weather is going to be cooler, because what do I know? I'm just repeating what the weather forecasters say. Today was supposed to be a cooler day than it was yesterday, but in the afternoon, when I walked the dog, it was as hot as it had been the day before. I was sweltering in my less skimpy clothes and when I got home, I took as many of them off as I could. 

Well, that was my start to this blog post. That's as exciting as I can get. I don't know how to get it more interesting than that. 

The dog and the cat are chasing another mouse around the apartment. It's the third one in as many days. I can't believe the cat brought in another one. I've tried to rescue it, but I've been unable to so far. The dog is especially very fanatic about it.  He acts like he does this for a living. He's a real hunter and the cat hardly gets a chance to participate. I'm slightly disgusted with the whole thing. 

I had my hair cut this afternoon. I went to the walk in place next to the pharmacy where you don't have to make an appointment. They also don't wash your hair, so I had that pleasure when I came home. That's when I really got to see what my hair looked like. 

A decent job was done and it was less expensive than when I go to my regular hairdresser. The woman cut it nice and short and spunky. I like the way I look, so it was worth the 12.50 Euros that it cost, which is very cheap. The next time I'll have to remember to wash my hair first. It's not so good when you have a lot of hairspray in it and it gets cut.

I think that mouse is dead. The cat and the dog are doing other things now and all is quiet. I'll have to go look for it so I don't step on anything unpleasant with my bare feet... Oh, I already found it. It was little and sopping wet from the dog's mouth. I flushed it down the toilet. I didn't know what else to do with it. It didn't seem like a good idea to put it in the trash with this heat.

The Exfactor did the groceries this morning and got me the cheese crackers. I had asked him to get me two packages and it's a good thing I did, because the packages are very small. I had to almost laugh when I saw them. I should have asked for four of them.

I've tried them and I like them very much, almost too much, so I have to contain myself. I have to definitely set a limit of how many I can eat all at once. They are salty and cheesy, just what I wanted and had imagined, but they are junk food and I was not really prepared for that. I thought they were going to be healthier. I'm a little bit disappointed and a bit concerned. I don't normally eat junk food. I find it's too addictive. That's why it was made, to make you want to eat more of it.

I'm going to bed in a little while and I'm looking forward to it very much. There's nothing like it at the end of a well spent day. It's especially nice when you know you will wake up with a decent hairdo. Why do I wait so long to get my hair cut? It's so simple to get it done and I look so much nicer. There ought to be a law against letting your hair grow too long. 

I'm full of it. It's time to end this post. I'm very thirsty and need to drink about a liter of cold milk.

Have a good evening you all. 

Ciao,

Nora

...and other tales of comfort.

I just took the dog for a walk in the cool evening air. It had rained briefly in the afternoon and the sky was overcast. There was even a little bit of a breeze and I needed a cardigan over my skimpy clothes. At least the dog was not uncomfortable because of the heat like he was yesterday. Right now it's only 66F, so it's not very warm. I think it's just right. 

After I took a nap this afternoon, I had a small bowl of chocolate pudding because I craved chocolate. I usually do when I wake up, although sometimes a small package of crackers will do. I eat plain crackers, but lately I've been craving salty, cheesy ones. I think I will have the Exfactor get me a box of those and I will see how much I like them. 

I don't want to like them too much and eat them all at once. If I do that, I don't want them in the cupboards and I won't get them again. I make a box of crackers last a whole week and I want the cheesy ones to last that long too. The Exfactor is doing the groceries tomorrow. I'll keep you up to date on the cheesy crackers. 

I make the chocolate pudding last a long time and never run out. I only eat one bowl a day, but I thoroughly enjoy that bowl. The pudding is cold and smooth and satisfying and I eat just enough of it. My gastric band can handle that amount. It's a real treat and it has to stay that way. 

That's why I'm not really going to get any ice cream. I know I would eat the ice cream all at once until it was all gone because I'm crazy about it. It's not such a good idea to have something like that in the freezer. That's why it's so good to have the chocolate pudding instead. I'm much more sensible about it. 

Ice cream would go straight to my hips and I don't need it there. That doesn't mean that I will not go to the best ice salon in town this summer because I know I will. I will have a large ice cream sundae with real whipped cream on top. That will be my special treat. I can't wait to go. I'll ask the Exfactor to go with me.

In a little while, I'm going to change the sheets on my bed and make it a real treat to go to sleep tonight. I'll put on the sheets that were dried outside on the clothesline. They smell heavenly. I've been looking forward to it, but kept putting it off for one reason or another. I'm very determined now. 

I will wash the dirty sheets right away and hang those outside to dry tomorrow. Hopefully there will be no rain and if there is, then that's just too bad. Things are bound to dry sooner or later. Today's shower was only a little one and the clothesline is protected by a lot of trees. I will hope for the best. 

I hope you're all having a good evening and a good start to the week. 

Ciao,

Nora

A load off my mind...

I'm sitting here drinking coffee after I woke up from a nap in the dark and cool bedroom. It was most pleasant and I had an interesting dream in which I remembered the name of a medication that I want to ask my GP about. I just googled it and it exists here. I haven't used it in 18 years, but it's a most helpful one for a woman in her middle aged years. I can't wait to get it now. It's Metamucil, orange flavored. If it hadn't been for that dream, I wouldn't have remembered the name. 

The cat got a new flavor cat food. I was afraid that she wasn't going to like it as I tossed out what was left over of her old one and poured the new one into her bowl. However, she went for it immediately and has been chowing down on it ever since. She apparently does not have very discriminate tastes. I'm hoping that she'll continue to like this new one because it comes in a much larger, more economical bag that closes airtight.

The dog acts like he is jealous of her new food while I know in my heart that he has no interest in it whatsoever. It's just the newness of it that appeals to him. Besides, he always thinks that he has to be in on everything thats new and available. Luckily, the cat eats her food on the kitchen counter, well away from the dog, so she is safe. She does always leave behind many footprints that I constantly have to wipe away, especially when it is rainy and they are muddy.

We are expecting a shower tomorrow afternoon, but I won't hold my breath for it. Such things have been predicted in the past without actually coming about. We're having a bit of a heatwave right now, though the temperatures are still bearable. It's 81F right now, which is warm for the time of year. It's only May, after all.  Oh, and I saw my first red poppies growing. What a sight. 

Today was a nice enough day. Nothing spectacular happened. It was just a plain ordinary day that went by quickly. I did laundry and an extra load to get an opportunity to wash my bathrobe which was due for it. It was full of stains and very grubby. I would have been embarrassed to be seen in it. Luckily, I very seldom am. I don't get caught off guard that often. 

I wore my Capri leggings and a cotton tank top and my sandals. It was as summery as I could get. That's the least amount of clothes I'll wear in public. It is funny to go out so skimpily dressed. You feel like you've not got enough clothes on. Fortunately, you notice that everyone else is similarly dressed.

Well, I've got to take the dog for a walk. It is that time of day again. I've also got to take my medicines. If I want to stay sound of mind, I better not forget that. I hope you're all having a good day and that the weather is treating you well. 

Ciao,

Nora

Without mentioning the obvious...

Right, where was I before I was so rudely interrupted by life? It feels like it's been a long time since I was here, while it has only really been two days. So, that's no time at all. You mustn't think that I've got anything special to share either, because I don't. There's been no excitement here at all.

The only things I've got to report is that yesterday was Remembrance Day and today is Liberation Day, but neither of these days make hardly any impact on my life at all, except that I observed two minutes of silence yesterday evening while watching the memorial ceremony on television. That was my contribution to the activities.

You mustn't think that I don't care, because I do. It's just that there's been no opportunity for me to join in on any of the festivities that are organized around town. I've been keeping to myself and you certainly don't seek out company when you keep to yourself. It's part of my agoraphobia. It wouldn't be so bad if I had someone to go with me. Maybe I have a social phobia. I was awfully shy when I was a kid. I hide it behind a lot of bravery now, but the shyness comes seeping out all over the place. I'm not at all a brave person, really.

My favorite thing to do in the afternoon is to take a nap. I wait for my medicines to start working and go to bed where I lie listening to the radio until I drift off for a few hours. I think it's the best time of the day. Any time spent sleeping is. It's the safest activity I can think of.  I wouldn't mind being asleep more often. Of course, you do get done sleeping at a certain point. You've just done enough of it and aren't tired anymore. That's the sad part of that.

I don't even like being awake in the middle of the night that much anymore. I'd rather be asleep, but I don't manage that yet. I was up last night and tried to write a post, but I wasn't able to do it. I wasn't in the right frame of mind and deleted everything I did try to write. They were all futile attempts. I don't think I have to be inspired every time I sit down to write. I think it's okay if sometimes nothing comes of it. I don't see it as a literary failure. 

I said I was rudely interrupted by life, but of course I'm not at all. Life doesn't interrupt me in the least. The only movements that happen in my existence are the unexpected ebbs and flows that suddenly appear because of the fickleness of my moods. They interrupt me, life doesn't at all. Life is a smooth pond in which now and then a ripple appears. It is something completely different from what happens in my psyche. 

I think I've written enough nonsense. It's time for me to walk the dog. He's sitting here looking longingly at me with his big brown eyes.

Have a good evening you all. 

Ciao,

Nora

If and only if...

I'm sitting here with my second cup of coffee, desperately trying to get into a good mood. I know I can do it because I'm stubborn enough for it. I will not be held back by a grumpy mood, especially not when I'm the one who most suffers from it. There's no one here to share the effects of it with me, much as I'd like a comforting arm around my shoulders. Or someone to help me analyze the cause of my mood. I have to do that all on my own and it does get tiresome. 

I took a nap this afternoon and I woke up in a good enough mood. I felt kindhearted when I just got up and I turned on the computer without giving it much thought. I made a pot of coffee and answered some emails. Within the shortest amount of time I was as grumpy as I can be and I didn't feel like being kind anymore at all. I've noticed that sitting behind the computer very often has that effect on me, yet I do it automatically anyway. You'd think I'd know enough to stay away from it. 

I think that maybe sitting behind the computer isn't nearly the complete therapeutic activity that we think it is. As a matter of fact, maybe it is highly frustrating to be constantly confronted with it and your social contacts. It makes you feel like you always have to be good and kind and on your best behavior when in fact you sometimes just aren't and don't want to be. It's as though you really don't have any private time behind your own computer, as though there's always social pressure there too. 

When you add the social pressure of sitting behind the computer to the social pressure you feel in real life, it gets to be too much. There's no escape anymore. There's no safe place to go to. 

That's my immediate analysis. It's the one that is the most obvious. I'm curious the find out who else feels stress behind the computer. Maybe we should allow people more of an opportunity to be grumpy in private and not always expect them to be kind and polite. 

Have a nice day, or not. It's up to you. 

Ciao,

Nora