Because I am planning on sleeping through the night, I will write this blog post now. You will wonder how I know that I will sleep through the night, but that is because last night I had a very hard time trying to come to my senses and should not even have gotten up. For the first hour or so that I sat here, I was constantly falling asleep and having lucid dreams, so where I really belonged was in bed. I had only gotten up to go to the toilet and very foolishly thought I was awake enough to make sense behind the computer. If you have to make that much effort to wake up, you had better go back to bed.
So that is what I am planning on doing tonight when I have to go to the toilet again. I will go straight back to bed and not let myself be fooled into doing anything but sleep. I need a good night of it, because I will be setting back the clocks and my watch one hour before I go to bed tonight. It is Daylight Savings Time again, and when I wake up tomorrow morning at a reasonable hour, it will hopefully be light outside. If I am really lucky, I will also be greeted by birdsong.
I have decided that I don't want to be cremated when it is my time, but that I want to be buried in a cozy graveyard in a grave with a pretty stone on top. I changed my funeral insurance to be able to cover the costs and they sent me the new policy yesterday. There also was a booklet included in which I can write all my wishes for the ceremony, etcetera, when the time comes. For that reason, I have decided that I should belong to a church whose minister can take care of the official duties, and tomorrow I am going to the service in one.
It is the St. Jan's Church, which is a protestant church and one of the few ones here in a province that is mostly roman-catholic. The church dates from the 17th century and was a catholic church to start with. When it became a protestant church, the beautiful murals inside were painted over, but they have since been restored and are visible now, and during the week, can be viewed and enjoyed by everyone.
I hope I am making the right decision and that this is a well enough enlightened religious community for me to join. I have few choices and I will not go to a catholic church. I only know that it is a protestant church and not what brand of it it is. I generally have a good feeling about this and I think I am on the right path. Whoever is in charge up there, will have to guide me through this. Maybe this is one more step in the journey I make for the overall wellbeing of my body and mind. I am not trying to force anything, but just let it have its natural course. I sure don't want to manipulate the outcome.
I always have to be wary of decisions I make because I may make them while I am hypomanic. I don't believe that I am now, but then again, I am the worst judge of that. I do get over enthused about things and go off half cocked and full of, what I think, are the best intentions. Well, you know the road to hell...