I thought I had slept for a long time when Tyke woke me up, but it turned out to only have been a nap once I could figure out what the real time was on the alarm clock. I was very disappointed, but the worst thing was that I was very discombobulated and could not get my head straightened out. I felt awful and was filled with all sorts of negative feelings that bore down on me heavily and I wanted to be dead for the first half hour that I was up.
Luckily, I had made coffee and drank a couple of cups of it and after a while the caffeine started to work. Now I am not suicidal anymore, although I am not quite back to normal yet, but who's to say what is normal? Let's just say that my thoughts are not so odd that I am doubting my sanity. Maybe it's because I am in temporary fear of losing my sanity that I want to be dead. Having seen my father go mad, it must be something that I am very much afraid of. How is that for a bit of analytical thinking?
I had been having hot flashes while I slept and am having them again now. I am continually taking off my bathrobe and putting it back on again. I have an appointment with the female GP next week to find out if anything can be done for them. I looked them up on the internet, but found no solution. I think it's awfully late in my life for me to be having them and that is why I am going for advice. I really hope I will be given a hormone treatment like I did when I was in my 40's, but I doubt that I will. I think hot flashes in themselves are not enough of a problem for that.
After putting it off for a week, I finally got my paperwork done and visited my online bank account. I had much unopened mail and had become more averse to opening it the longer I put it off. I did that yesterday morning after giving myself a good internal talking to. There are two hitches in the system that I need to take care of in the morning and one of them may take a bit of effort to solve, but I have no doubt that I will. I am after all an optimist when it comes down to it and I do have to keep that in mind.
Speaking of optimism, I assume that I will sleep through the night and wake up to the sound of birds chirping in the morning. They start as early as 4 am and that is way before the sun comes up. I suppose you could say that birds are optimists also.