Wishful thinking...

Although I wished it very much, I came to realize yesterday that Toby was not at all better. I had put Tyke outside so he would not bother us, and put Toby down in middle of the kitchen floor where he proceeded to fall over and make his stumbling way back to the paper box with much effort. It was painful to see and rather discouraging. He's been in the paper box ever since, except for one clumsy visit to the litter box. So the news is not good.

I thought the Exfactor was going to be here yesterday to take Toby to the vet, but I had misunderstood him and he is going to be here today, which gave Toby a reprieve of one day and me the opportunity to observe him a while longer. I've observed him all I can now and I can only come to one conclusion and that is that he needs to be put out of his misery. I can't keep postponing this. It is selfish if I do.

Anyway, I'm in an undetermined mood and I don't know what to make of it. I hope it is related to Toby's condition and it's outcome and that I'm not about to slide down the slippery slope. I'm not exactly elated right now, but I'm not really depressed either. I'm a little on the morose side and in order to compensate for that, I've ordered more new clothes that I can actually not afford, but thought were necessary to my wardrobe anyway.

I liked my harem pants so much that I've ordered another pair, but in a slightly different style and in a different color. They are very comfortable to wear and I've been enjoying the ones I just bought. They match up with a variety of tops and I can wear them in colder weather too with leggings underneath them.

I ordered some T-shirts with large print on them to go with them and I think I will look rather cool. I did not consider if they were age appropriate, considering myself ageless.

I ordered a summer top and two summer dresses on sale that I can wear with leggings and long sleeve stretch T-shirts underneath when it gets colder. Of course, I can also wear my long sleeved black bolero over them and my short sleeved long black cardigan.

I suppose I get the need for new clothes when I need to make myself feel better and to brighten my day. I'm also more aware of what's in my closet now that I've cleaned it out and I see what is missing from it and what I don't wear anymore and what doesn't really fit of what's left in there. I do get picky about my clothes and I do love my favorite clothes so very much.

There seem to be times of the year when I love new clothes more than other times. I'm already thinking about the fall and the clothes that I will wear then, although I'm not remotely thinking about the winter yet and will not for a while. I will postpone any thoughts of it until the first freeze, probably, although I have already bought that fabulous new scarf for 5 euros. That was a give away. It's so long that I can wrap it around my neck twice. That's my early acknowledgment

to winter.

It's early in the morning and I've been up for hours. Yesterday morning I cleaned up the kitchen and swept the floors. I took a nap on the sofa afterwards. It was very pleasant as I had the TV on for company and would wake up every once in a while to the latest news.

I have to go see my SPN this morning and I'm going to ask her where my sense of humor has gone. I seem to take everything so seriously and don't see the humor in anything. I don't even laugh when I hear a joke. I over analyze everything, even jokes. I get tired of it myself.

Have a good day,

Ciao,
Nora