Monday, February 01, 2010
I suppose when it really comes down to it, I don't so much write for the sake of you as I write for the sake of myself. I mean that I have a compulsion to write at certain times of the day even when I don't have anything noteworthy to report. I just need to sit here and tell a story and I don't know if I tell you the story or if I tell myself it. I guess it is a letter to myself to remind me of what I have done and thought and mused over and observed, yet if that were completely true I might as well write it in a notebook and not make it public, so obviously I need an audience and feedback. I write an ego document that I want to make known. But I'll try to write as if I'm the only witness to it, though I doubt very much if that is possible. Even Anne Frank wrote to an imaginary friend she called 'Dear Kitty.'
I'll set the scene. I'm sitting here in my very warm, red bathrobe by the desk lamp with my cup of coffee and the inevitable cigarette. My feet are still bare, but soon I will get my slippers on, because my feet will get cold and my toes will feel like ice cubes. The dog is asleep on his blanket, but has been over here to be petted several times. He wags his stubby tail and gives me a mournful look that means, "Don't neglect me."
Outside there is still a little bit of snow, but not very much. Only in the places where the sunshine doesn't reach during the day are there a couple of centimeters. It is 0C outside and it's supposed to be snowing now, but I see no evidence of it. Oh yes, I just had a better look and it is snowing indeed. It's supposed to do that the rest of the day also if I'm supposed to believe the weather forecast on my browser.
I didn't fall asleep until almost midnight. For some reason I went to bed late and read for a long time. I also ate Pringle's Onion and Cheese potato chips. Those were very nice, but made me very thirsty. They must be very salty and I probably had a week's worth of sodium last night. I don't recommend anyone doing this before they go to bed. It's a foolish thing to do. I shouldn't even buy them, but sometimes it is hard to withstand them when you're in the supermarket and you see them there so invitingly on the shelf. I shouldn't go down that aisle anymore. It's actually easy to avoid. I have no business being there.
I can't go back to sleep this morning, because I have to go to the tobacconist and he is only open in the mornings on Mondays. In a little while I have to take my medicines and when I'm done writing this I'll take the dog for his walk. Maybe I'll lie down on the sofa after I've gotten my tobacco. In the afternoon I have to go see my GP for the results of the blood tests and I have been trying to figure out all weekend what he wants to talk to me about that he couldn't discuss over the telephone. It's a mystery to me. I suppose it's normal for me to say that I'm just a little bit worried.
Well, that's all the sharing I have to do this morning. It's not very deep, but I'm not in the mood for an intellectual post today. I have other things on my mind. I'm preoccupied.
Have a nice day!