Monday, March 25, 2013

In the serenity of the moment...

It would be easy to convince myself that I am completely calm and serene now, while directly underneath my skin things are humming along as busy as a swarm of bees. That is why it is very important that I live in this moment and keep my mind on writing this post and not let it wander to a dozen other subjects that keep wanting to distract it. So being calm and serene is not as easy as it sounds, and I am having a heck of a time with it.

After having had such an adventurous weekend of downloading and installing Windows 8, and then learning how to use it, it is time to return to the regular order of the day. It is going to be Monday, after all, and the start of a new week, and I can not be lying down on the job. My personal helper is going to be here in the morning and I still have to do this weekend's dishes. I did get a little sidetracked from doing my regular chores these past two days.
I am actually looking forward to going back to bed in a while to finish sleeping, because Tyke woke me up when I was still sound asleep and not at all ready to get up yet. He is a good guard dog and will prevent anyone from breaking in, but it is kind of a bother when he barks at midnight. I can not get angry at him about it, though, because he is doing his job. The problem is that he probably wakes up the neighbors too, although they have not complained.
I am having all sorts of cravings for all sorts of food and they are all bad for me. It is a good thing that I am not in possession of any of them, because I would eat them all, even though I would know better. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. I crave ice cream and bonbons and vanilla pudding. You know I would have a really bad time if I ate them. I am already sitting here with cramps in my stomach and my belly, but I do not have the vaguest idea why I have them. I did not eat anything that was bad for me as far as I know.
Yesterday I wore a short jacket that I bought in the week that my sister Marianne died. It is a cute jacket and it looks good on me, but I have the hardest time wearing it because of the memories attached to it. I put it on sometimes, determined to get other memories attached to it, but I can only wear it for a day and then it goes back into the closet and I breathe a sigh of relief. Today I will also wear something else and I am already glad for it. I will wear something that is not so loaded with emotion.


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