It is amazing what the addition of one little pill can do to your constitution. I have gone from being an intense and somewhat fanatic woman, to being a very calm and serene one and I find that this state of mind that I am in now, is very agreeable to me and I let myself sink into it as if I am laying in a bed of rose petals.
That does not mean I am only capable of sitting here in a stupor and dreaming my life away. Au contraire, I do get things done, but in a very calm and orderly way, without the least amount of frustration and pain. I feel as though I am cushioned from sharp shocks to my system by a layer of soft bubbly foam and that this insulation is the kindest way for me to stand in the world right now.
I am also sleeping very well. I went to bed a 9 PM last night and slept until 8 AM this morning and I made myself get up, because the Überhund and I both had to take our medications and he had to go for his walk. I could have stayed in bed a few more hours and slept a little longer, which is a real pleasant thing for me to happen.
Although all along I have had a good time, I now feel so good about having a certain amount of tension gone and excitement. If I could grow old this way, I would definitely prefer it to the tough broad variety. I like this mellow broad I am now.
I haven't taken any photographs yet. I haven't been any place of interest yet and I want to decide what I want to take photographs off. I may take it to my creative therapy class tomorrow and take photographs of the people there. That's because I have grown fond of them and want some record of my time there.
I don't want to take all the obvious photographs of downtown, but I almost don't see how I won't, because it will all be a learning process of what makes a good picture and what doesn't. So, I will probably photograph a lot of standard things before I get to the really good stuff.
My sister is on her single vacation in Greece now. She'll be gone for a week. Her ex is taking care of the kids and the dog and I am staying well away from there in case I get roped into doing something, which I won't do. I say the man is a grown up and quite capable of shelling his own beans, as we say here.
I have accidentally taught the Überhund a new trick. When I am in the kitchen, he will very often bark at me from the living room for a treat. So, today I said to him, "If you want a treat, you have to come to me and sit very nicely and let me know what you want." So, now he comes into the kitchen and sits beside me and barks once and that means, "I want a cookie." He is too smart for words. His skull is not out of proportionately large to the rest of his body. I assume his brain is of the normal size for a dog.
The Exfactor is changing his style of clothing. he is wearing large hooded sweatshirts and baggy pants with zippers and pockets. It's a whole new Exfactor. I am watching this development in amusement and can't wait to see what sort of clothes he is going to wear next. I appreciate him developing a new style of his own, just as I am developing my own style, but I have been working on it for a few years and this one for the Exfactor is new, so it is very interesting. His dress jacket and his dress shoes are still in my closet and I don't think he is ever going to come and get them.
Isn't it funny how we influence people in the way they think they ought to dress when we really don't come right out and say so? Apparently the Exfactor thought I liked jeans and T-shirt and sweaters, so he wore those, when really those were not my first choice. I am glad he is doing what he wants now, although I sense an influence of the Paramount there, but that is okay. There is absolutely no harm in that.
I've developed my own style and I don't know who influences me, if anybody does. I think I just make up my own mind about what I like. I have some sort of vision about what I should look like and I find the clothes to match that. I am very lucky in that a lot of those kinds of clothes are available, the colors and the styles. I think shopping is the ultimate thrill and then wearing the clothess that you bought and trying to match them with as many other clothes and accesories as you have.
I am woman, hear me roar...
The Überhund is making 'take me for a walk' noises, so I suppose that'what i will do now. It is that time of day. It is like he can tell time by looking at the clock.
Have a good Sunday, you all.
Ciao...
14 comments:
That's a relief, you know how I worry. Glad to hear things are a bit chilled. Funny about the clothes business, you are both expressing yourselves in that way. Long live freedom. How interesting to find out that the Exfactor was trying to please you with his style. It is one reason they say better to be honest at the beginning of relationships, otherwise you can get lumbered with your pretences... I hadn't heard it about clothes, but I had heard about a friend having to listen to boring dreadful music forever because she pretended she liked it... hahahah -
Keep well with that clever hound.
hugs
sorry - i double-clicked and got two identical comments posted.
I'm hoping you didn't do anything in your 'up' state that will cost you in the future. I know that happens and then people are stuck or are trying to take things back.
The new you? Calm and collected. Fantastic! The other you - hyper and hard - fantastic!
You can be both I think. I think you will be able to pick how you want to be out of the Irene's available to you. At the very very end when you have gone through it all - that Irene will be something to see as well won't she?
Glad you are enjoying your new self. Life is so interesting, and reading your post reminds me so.
Glad you are feeling sorted again now. Hope you are taking things a bit easy.
Maybe the Exfactor is having a mid life crisis!
Hope you had a lovely warm sunny day, like we did.
G/nite X
I see you moved to a new house. looks good.
It's always best to please yourself and be happy. I'm glad you're doing so now.
Hi Irene,
I just finished catching up with you and see that you've had a lot going on the past few days! I'm glad you're feeling better now. Sometimes its easier to be the "tough broad" rather than deal with whats really going on inside of us. At least I feel that way sometimes. Doesn't mean its the best thing for us to do though. Hang in there because it is a process.
Happy wandering!
The Writer...and her dog, Bear
You will probably enjoy taking photos on your digital camera. I know I do. I have just bought a better one and am in the process of working out how to use it.
Why not join the Two Things, because numbers are down at the moment.
You look great in your jacket, very slim. I like the way you are holding that ciggie with attitude lol
Photography rules- compositionof thirds.
Get close, remove distracting elements.
We read left to right - composision with focus on right tends to be more peaceful than if to the left. Eye sits rather than jumps around.
Best light is early or late or overcast.
Harsh mid day sun throws strong shaddows.
Have to kiss a lot of frogs.
I'm glad to read that your Sunday was enjoyable. I hope your week remains so.
CJ xx
John, I am sure that there is a lot you can teach me about photography, but here's a gentle reminder: the Exfactor took that picture and he is supposed to be the whiz, but I don't believe it, because most of his pictures of me are bad. I usually look like a horrid old witch as he has no eye for the details. I will endeavor to do a much better job, that's why I am biding my time with the camera and waiting for the right circumstances. They will arrive, I am sure of it. The subject matter will present itself to me soon.
irene, I have been having one helluva job since you moved again, this time in trying to link directly to your blog instead of either that internet page or this 'Comments' section. Give me the correct url, would you, sweetheart? (Well, you know what I am like on the technical side of things!) ;-)
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