Monday, November 30, 2009
Early in the morning is also good...
I've had a few hours of sleep last night and then I woke up and was all done with that, so I got up and walked into the kitchen, turning the computer on on my way there, and made myself a cup of coffee. The dog decided to be difficult immediately and start whining for things and I got very angry with him and he got the message and went to sleep under the coffee table on his blanket. I was just tired of his behavior and I'm going to keep being this strict, because he's getting out of hand. He's like a darn whiny kid who is a regular pain in the you know what.
I had thought about sweeping and mopping the floors while I was up, but I never did get around to that and answered emails instead, which always takes me a little while, because I want to take my time doing it and think about what I want to write. Not that it is then anything earth shattering, but I do want to put some thought into it. My oldest niece sent me oodles of pictures of her beautiful daughter, so I had to admire those and copy them into the right folder. I think I have more photos of her than I have of anyone else. She has very proud parents.
In my last post I said I had to pick out the clothes I was going to wear today and I did. I'm going to wear black leggings and a blue denim skirt, with a purple long sleeved stretch t-shirt and a black long sleeved top over it, so that the purple t-shirt shows at the top, and a black bolero over that with a black and gray and purple striped scarf. I'll be wearing matching bracelets and my comfortable boots. Isn't that just splendid? I was going to wear my black and white and gray dress at first, but decided against it, as it made me look kind of bulky and I must prevent that at all cost. I'm always glad when my scheming little mind thinks of another good outfit to wear and it works. I used to think I had no fashion sense, until I got a part time job in a clothing store and I had to help people find clothes and look good myself too. That was lost of fun, especially since I got my clothes at a discount. I always kept a close eye on the sales rack and made my move when something good was put on sale. I had a very easy size back then and could fit in all the clothes that were sold there.
I think I will go to the grocery store early this morning before I go to creative therapy. They open at 8 am and there will be hardly any customers there. It really is the best time to shop and it will be better than waiting until this afternoon when I will feel like it less, because I will be tired and it will be busy there. It is a heck of a lot less intimidating to go there when there's hardly anyone there and there was a period a few years ago when I always went shopping first thing in the morning. I think that may have been during a long hypomanic episode, I don't quite remember, but I do know that I got a lot done in that time. I think I was always cleaning and doing the dishes and vacuuming. I should have one of those episodes again soon. It would come in mighty handy. I like it when I have boundless energy and I can take on jobs as if they are the easiest things in the world. That's mighty nice.
I'm so ready not to be serious this week. I feel like all last week I was dealing with serious subjects and kept myself occupied with the inner workings of my mind, and especially my past, and today I feel like doing none of those things and to be carefree and to let things come as they may and I'll see what happens with them. That doesn't mean I'm not going to plan things carefully, but I'm going to do everything to my advantage and not worry about if I'm doing it right or not in other people's eyes. I'm simply not going to care. I hope I remember I said this tomorrow. I'll have to be reminded of it if I get too serious again. I sure hope one of you will do that for me.
So far the dog is behaving very well. I've let him out back for a piddle, but I talked very sternly to him and when I gave him his bone I said very harshly, "Here you go and that is it and no whining!" He has gone back to sleep without a peep out of him. I guess I've been too nice to him lately and he is getting the wrong message. It's my own fault, I have to set the limits. He moves within the boundaries that I set. It's like having a whiny blooper for a kid. You've got to say a loud no at one point and be very serious about it and mean it. Otherwise they don't know what to do with the freedom that you give them.
The coffee tastes especially good this morning. I must have gotten a hold of a good batch. Actually, I just opened a new pack, so it is very fresh. I love the smell of it when I first open a new pack of coffee pads. You just want to dive into it with your whole face and drown in the aroma. I always imagine that I can taste the difference between the new pads and the old pads, but that may just be my imagination or wishful thinking. I love a new cup of coffee so much that I assume all sorts of things about it, depending on where I drink it, but in the Netherlands I've never had a bad cup of coffee. I did in a roadside restaurant in France, that was truly the worst cup of coffee I ever tasted. Hardly anything is worse than looking forward to a cup of coffee and having it be a bad one. I've talked about this subject already haven't I? God, there's nothing worse than repeating yourself and catching yourself doing it.
I've come to the end of this post anyway, because it's time to take my medicines and get the show on the road. I will go out in the world, neatly dressed and ready to face the day and willing to tackle whatever comes my way.
I hope you all have a nice day with lots of good weather. I hope for the same here.