I'm serenely seated here behind the computer in the middle of the night (or call it early in the morning) and I've just about had all the coffee I want to drink. It's time to switch to that old stand by, a glass of ice cold milk, to make me burp some. I'm almost used to the special effects and expect them now. It wouldn't be the same experience without them. So you see, you get used to any strange phenomenon as long as it's familiar.
When I say I'm serene, I mean I have a fairly peaceful mind as I have had for a long while now. I went to bed with it and got up with it. As we say in the Netherlands, I fit into my skin well. I don't know where that saying came from, but it is widely used and it sounds more appealing in Dutch. We use the word 'lekker' which is untranslatable. Some words and concepts aren't, which is a shame because so much feeling is meant by them. 'Lekker' is everything that is good and then some.
I woke up writing a blog post in my head before I had even opened my eyes. I now don't remember what it was about, but I think it is funny that I'm so occupied with it in the middle of the night. Apparently, I'm immediately ready to go write one when I wake up. Maybe I dream about it while I'm asleep. It wouldn't surprise me, although I know it's mostly nonsense what I think of first. I do remember that much.
For a change it wasn't the dog who woke me up. I did it all on my own and I must have an internal alarm clock that tells me to get up at a certain time of the night. It's when I'm temporarily all done sleeping and I'm ready for some entertainment to interrupt my long night. I don't really mind this, but I wouldn't mind either sleeping all night and not waking up until the morning. It would be awfully nice to be woken up by the real alarm clock. I wouldn't mind having to set it before I went to bed.
It's funny how you learn to accept any kind of schedule as being normal simply because that's what you have gotten used to. In my former life, I used to sleep long and hard all night long and you would have had to shoot off a canon to wake me up. Now I sleep like I'm alert to the least little noise and I'm ready to get up for no reason at all. I do long for those deep, heavy sleeps of long ago. They were very restful.
At least I'm not comatose anymore when I wake up in the morning. That's a big blessing. I function fairly well. I'm more then capable of making a very decent pot of coffee and I don't have to drink the whole pot in order to get dressed and be ready to take the dog for a walk. And getting dressed is simple if the weather is cool and crisp and you know which clothes to put on. I always think that makes things much easier.
I've got to go back to bed and sleep a few more hours. I'm going to see my new therapist this morning for my first official appointment. I do want to be alert and fresh looking when I get there. I do want it to be a productive meeting. Wish me luck.
Have an especially nice day in this autumnal weather.