In charge again...

Whatever was bothering me, has stopped doing so. It has stopped making me feel stressed and anxious and left me feeling relaxed and happier. It stopped this afternoon and I've been much pleased ever since. I've celebrated that with several cups of coffee and they in turn made me feel much better too, so it was a double joyful happening. I don't feel that anything can go wrong now. 

I'm enjoying this time as much as I can and am relishing the easiness of it. Hardly anything seems complicated anymore. Things I worried about before seem so benign in nature now. I laugh at the fact that I was intimidated by them earlier. I've certainly found my courage again. I guess you have to hit the bottom a bit before you bounce back up. Luckily, I didn't hit it too hard. 

It goes to show you that you mustn't get too caught up in your temporary moods. They may only be of short nature but you can spend a lot of that time worrying about things when all you need to do is wait for the mood to change. Unfortunately, a person is never smart enough to realize that or maybe some people are very even natured and they don't go through these ups and downs so much. When attacked by stress, I do. 

It usually takes a good dose of realism to get me on the path of the straight and narrow again and that is where I am now. There aren't many bends in the road anymore. Before there were many twists and turns and the whole situation was unforeseeable. I felt I might miss a curve and get a fatal accident. Now I'm cruising along merrily and in charge again and I'm going along at the right speed. 

All this speaking in metaphores does not become me and I'll stop right now and get to reality on all fronts. 

I've just peeled an apple for the dog and he is very happily chowing down on it. Actually, he does eat it very delicately for a dog. He takes rather small bites as if he wants to make it last. He's always very disappointed when he's eaten it all and looks all over the place for bits and pieces. He eats to efficiently for there to be any.

The apartment is  clean and the dishes have been done. I'm ready for the weekend. All I have to do is change the bed and walk the dog. 

Have a good one.

Ciao,
Irene

A rainy Sunday.

It's only 7 degrees Celsius outside and it's been raining on and off all day. I haven't seen the blue sky yet, let alone any sunshine. I know there was a super moon during the night but it was not visible here because of the overcast sky. I missed that spectacle completely. I have to say that I don't feel especially energized or rebirthed or anything because of the close proximity of the moon to the earth. I guess that effect didn't work on me.

I'm doing jobs around the apartment. Now that I've struggled with and overcome my depression, it's time to take care of the things that were left undone for a while. Not all of them will get done today but that's not my intention. Whatever I don't get to today will get done later this week. I will have a clean bed to get into tonight anyway. I made darn sure of that. 

The dog thinks it's great fun to strip the bed and put the clean sheets on. He's always right in the middle of things, not realizing that he's actually very much in the way. I have to calculate his presence in with every move I make and that is after I've removed the cat from the bed much to her displeasure. The job does get done and the dog helps me put the dirty sheets in the washing machine too. He thinks that's very interesting. Heck, he thinks he has to be present at and on top of everything I do. 

I've put the red fleece blanket on top of the duvet because the dog was a little cold at night. Now I can tell that he's a bit more comfortable and the cat seems to like it too. I can throw it in the washing machine easily and it is dry in no time at all. I should have a couple of them in different colors and replace one with the other to change the scenery. I hope to go to Ikea again soon and see what's available. Maybe I can get my sister in the mood for a trip over there. 

I had a big load of dishes to do that I hadn't gotten around to doing for a couple of days. I wasn't in the proper mood before and that hasn't happened in a long time. First I set most of them to soak in very hot soapy water. As many of them as I could get to fit into the basin. When I could stand the temperature of the water, I scrubbed them clean and was done before I knew it. It turned out not to be such a bad job after all. These things always look worse than they are. 

The apartment is pretty much organized now and ready for the domestic help tomorrow. I'm going to have a busy day because my personal helper is going to be here in the morning and I also have an appointment with my therapist in between. After the fact, it's not really necessary but we didn't know that when we planned it. I'm doing ever so much better than I was two days ago. There's a world of difference and you wouldn't even think I was the same person. 

Tomorrow it's going to be 16 degrees Celsius, so that's quite a difference. Have a great day!

Ciao,

Irene

Metamorphosis...

I'm happy to report that the medication for my headache is working well and that as long as I take it on time, I am pain free. It is really an anti-inflammatory medicine and I take one pill every eight hours and that is just good enough. I can't tell you what a relief it is not to be in pain anymore and to be able to move around normally. It's just plain wonderful. 

I'm so glad I went to the doctor and that he figured out so quickly what the problem was. I think he deserves a medal for that. That's how grateful I am. I could still be walking around in pain and I shudder at the thought. 

In the meantime, I'm sitting here with a cup of coffee having just woken up from a sound sleep in my new bedroom. The dog howled once and that was enough to immediately awaken me.I was a little confused about my whereabouts but soon figured it out. I was not in Kansas anymore but in the bedroom that had until just the day before been the junk room. 

The domestic help had cleaned it and you could literally eat off the floor. It was all the more obvious that the room needed painting, but now I know that the whole apartment does and it's going to be a big job that I'm not ready to tackle yet. I don't know when I will be able to and I think It;s going to take a small army to do the job. Either that, or a professional painter. I'll have to see how expensive that is. 

The domestic help is a peach. She didn't bat an eye when I asked her if she could clean the bedroom but was enthusiastic right away. She did a great job and when I asked her to help me move the furniture, she was more than eager to help and we worked as a great team together. She doesn't have to do that kind of work at all, but she likes to do me favors. We get along well.

After she left, I added some decorative touches to the room. I have a vase with lighted branches on a high plant stand and I strung up some fairy lights on the shelf system in the corner by the window to make it look cozy and festive. I added items to the bookcase along one wall and hung up a painting above it. I've got the dog's cushion beside my bed and the dog and the cat on my bed where they think they rightfully belong. 

The Exfactor came later in the afternoon but he didn't put the furniture together for the guest room. He had gone to work at seven o'clock in the morning and didn't have the energy left to do it. I could excuse him for that. He's going to do it on Monday or Tuesday and I will wait patiently. I have no other choice to tell you the truth. My sister can't help because she'll be in Italy. I may try to do it by myself, I'll see. It may be a two person job but I may be able to do it on my own. 

I'm having hot flashes as I sit here and I do think I'm too old for those. My fingers are swollen up too. My hormones must be off balance. I've got to blame it on something. 

I hope you're all havng a good night.

Ciao,

Irene

On the second Christmas day....

Because my daughter and her father will be going to Italy with my sister and her friend for a few days in the morning, I will have some time to myself and no need to get up early and to be dressed on time. I can be lazy and go as slow as I want. Once I finally get the show on the road, I will have to find a place for all the Christmas presents I got because I haven't had a chance to do that yet. 

The apartment is not that big and whenever new things come into it, a place has to be found for them and some rearranging has to be done. I got a lot of personal care products, so I need to empty a shelf in the bathroom to put them on. I always have to try to get things down to the very basics and not waste any space. Choices need to be made about what is obsolete and can be thrown out. And it can never be regretfully so. 

I got four new books and those need a place on the bookcase. Needless to say, they have a high priority to get read and I will do my utmost best to do that as soon as possible because they were all chosen with care. I will have to make it a point to sit down and read for a while every day in my armchair and do nothing else. It will be good training for my mind and my attention span. It will prevent my thoughts from drifting and that's something that definitely needs to happen. 

I got some anklet socks that are very soft and infused with some kind of lotion and I'm supposed to put them on after I have given myself a proper wellness treatment with all my personal care products, which I will do today. I've also gotten a nice set of lounge wear which I will wear tonight. I will treat myself nicely today and make it as special as I can. It will be my day off as far as that is possible with the dog. It's too bad that he needs to get walked or I would wear the lounge wear all day long.

Yesterday we went to Aachen, in Germany, and walked around downtown and visited Charlemagne's beautiful cathedral. The weather wasn't all that great, it was drizzling and cold, and we found a safe haven in a cozy cafe where we had something hot to drink. There was no sitting out on a heated terrace. Apparently the Germans don't do that kind of thing. I had a cappuccino with whipped cream and felt very decadent. That's not on the menu in the Netherlands. 

I should go back to bed now but I find myself wide awake. That is a bit of a problem. I doubt that I'd fall asleep now. I seem to be in the wrong time zone again. I'll have to find some way to keep myself busy until I get tired enough to go to bed. I will go find a place for all the Christmas presents.

Have a good day you all. 

Ciao,

Nora

It's officially Saturday...

What a wonderful day for it to be. Of course, I have no real reason to think why it should be, except that it's a weekend day and I still somehow stubbornly believe that those are better than weekdays. Old beliefs die hard and this one will too. 

Nowadays my weekdays are as nice as the weekends are because I live through them with the least amount of pain. The stress has gone out of them, so they are really no big deal anymore.

A little part of me must still think that Saturday and Sunday are superior days and until I believe differently, I will enjoy them in that capacity as much as I can. I may as well get the most out of it. There's no sense in wasting a good feeling once you've got it. I don't need to talk myself out of it.

At least there will be better daytime programs on TV than there are during the week. That always cheers me up. I do need my cultural input and my sports. I can't be deprived of them. My brain needs to be fed with interesting and entertaining information. 

Right now, though, I've very much got to tell myself to live in the moment and not anticipate the day too much. I have to enjoy the moment I'm in and the fact that I'm sitting here with a cup of coffee and my cigarettes, writing this post very leisurely. I'd almost forget to do that and it's so important. 

I'm sitting here in my pajamas and my bathrobe in an almost cool living room. All the windows are open at the top to keep airing out the apartment. It's chilly outside, but it never gets as cold inside. There's no wind blowing, so there's no draft to speak of.

I'm undecided if I'm going back to bed after I finish this. I may sit in the armchair and contemplate my navel. I actually feel very much awake and don't feel much like sleeping anymore. I'd like to have a garden to sit in and watch it become dawn. 

It's too bad that I don't like to read anymore because I could spend much leisurely time doing it. Now that I have the time, I don't have the inclination. I wonder if the urge to read will ever come back? I still treasure my books. To look at and for the memories. I just have no desire to read one. 

I hope you'll all have a great day.

Ciao,

Nora

Both feet on the ground...

One good thing about having quit almost all the tranquilizers is that I no longer sit here in the middle of the night higher than a kite and getting even more so because I'm drinking coffee. Nowadays, I'm pretty down to earth and mostly myself and not under the influence. 

At least, hardly any at all. I will stop taking the last tranquilizer tonight (Tuesday) when I go to bed. I will notice that I did for the first couple of days and will be a little bit off course, but I will recuperate soon enough and being off course doesn't have to be all unpleasant (I may be a little exuberant). 

It's a relief not to be high because I thought that was intrinsic to me and it's nice to find out that it was because of the tranquilizers. It certainly took me long enough to put two and two together. I always thought I was in a hypo-manic state in the middle of the night. 

It's a pleasure to find out that I'm not and that I'm as normal as anybody else. Especially since there's not such a huge difference compared to how I am when I wake up in the morning. I'm not like two different people.

I woke up yesterday morning to the alarm clock and it agreed with me better than sleeping until I was done sleeping. I think I get too discombobulated when I do that and get too much sleep. 

Waking up to the alarm clock was better, as it made me alert immediately and I felt I had to get into action right away and plan my moves. I have set the alarm clock for this morning too, even though I can sleep late. I just don't want to.

I have opened all the windows in the apartment at the top to air the place out properly and because there's a strong wind blowing due to the tail end of the hurricane that came off the Atlantic Ocean.

There's a strong enough draft blowing through here now and it smells a lot better in the living room. All that stale smoky air is gone. I'm going to keep the windows open this season as long as I can and hope for regular winds. 

It was sunny when I walked the dog yesterday, but because the wind was blowing, it felt quite blustery and I could imagine myself at the seaside. I like this kind of weather. It agrees with me quite well and this is what I like about autumn. 

The wind gives you a sense of freedom. It blows all your dark thoughts away and cleanses you from any worries you may have. I also like the way the sunlight is coming in at a lower angle. It seems less harsh and more comforting. 

I think I'm an autumn type of person and I always forget that about myself. It surprises me every year. Every year I make the same discovery. I should know this by now. I should know that I like the season of my birthday. 

It's time to go back to bed for a while with a glass of ice cold milk.

Have a great day.

Ciao,

Nora

Being less greedy...

I've found out tonight that drinking coffee from a small cup is really a good idea. I had to grab the smaller cup because all the bigger mugs are dirty and I haven't washed the dishes yet. I'm being lazy and wasn't planning on doing them until today. 

So I had to grab the small cup and drink my coffee from it and come to find out, it really is better because now I finish my coffee before it gets a chance to get cold, so obviously, this is exactly the amount of coffee I should be drinking all at once. 

I had gotten greedy and started thinking like an American in that bigger must be better, so more must be also, not realizing that I was half the time drinking cold coffee or tossing out the bottom third. 

Besides, big mugs have really become the rigmarole over here and it's hard to find a little one. I think you have to make a special effort to. 

I think I will now make it a point not to ask other people to buy me coffee mugs as a present, but to always be on the look out for cups that are on the small size myself.

That is on the rare occasions that I enter a store which sells household goods, which is rarely. I really have to go out of my way to do that. I lack an enormous amount of curiosity and money to go do that. 

I know that if I enter one, there will be all sorts of things that I'll want to buy. The displays will be enticing and my natural woman's instinct to want to spend money will immediately jump to the surface.

Since I'm the keeper of the finances, and solely responsible for them, I know which money can be spend and it can't go to frivolous things. There can be no self indulgence. 

Besides, I'm trying to make my life less cluttered and for each item that would enter it, something else would have to go. I also don't want any knick knacks. They would just clutter the place up and be more things to dust and keep in place. 

As it is now, I have to remove obsolete make up from the bathroom shelf because I'm probably never going to use it. I put it there in the hope that I would feel so feminine one day that I would, but it's a lost cause. 

I'm not going to use blusher or nail polish or lipstick, no matter which color it is in, so they can all go in my make up bag, which in itself is really obsolete. I never use any of the make up and the mascara will dry up one of these days and I'll end up having to toss it out.

It will be a fine day when I've taken several trash bags and have gone through the apartment and have gotten rid of things that I no longer have a need for. That will be a very liberating thing to do. One of these days the mood will strike me. 

Have a great Sunday!

Ciao,

Nora

Throwing a spanner in the works...

I was going to spoil this post by telling you how depressed I am, but I've decided not to do that and for the duration of this night only to look at the bright side of life. I'm sure I can find some amazingly cheerful things to write about if I try hard enough. 

I'm not so depressed right now that I only see things in the colors gray and black. I'm sure there are some brighter colors lurking in the shadows and I will set my sight on them. There's some yellow and bright red and light green. Little dots of it and I will see what I can do with them. 

I can tell you that I'm drinking an excellent cup of coffee and no doubt that has influence on the state of my mind, good coffee making for a better mood. I've also got a pack of newly made cigarettes, so I'm all set. 

For a while anyway I'm comfortable, except that I have a dog breathing down my neck who wants impossible things from me. I'll just have to ignore him and get on with it.

I do have an awful pain in my bad shoulder and I woke up with that. I've tried to move it around to try and get whatever kink is in it out, but it hasn't helped yet. I may be coming down with a case of bursitis again. I will have to rub that sport's creme on it and hope it works. 

It's impossible not to be influenced by the quiet and peacefulness of the night. I can almost imagine that I don't live in town but in the solitude of the countryside. The suburbs are awfully silent at night. The only noises I hear are those in my own apartment and those are very minute. The clicking of the dog's tags being one of them and the loudest.

I'm reminded of the time I lived in a village of 600 souls in the middle of the mountains on a dead end road. It was a wonderful place to be. There was much quiet and solitude and company if you so desired. I have fond memories of the place. My kids were little there and had a fun childhood. 

I better not go down memory lane because I'm a product of my turbulent life. I have many sad memories as well and they come floating to the top along with the good ones. It's better to stay in the here and now and to not remember too much. That's a closed book and it has nothing to do with my life now. I'm a totally different person living a totally different life and nothing at all like I had imagined. 

Today my effort is going to be to get the mail out of the mailbox and to deal with it and to deal with the mail that's already lying on my desk. If I get that done I'll be satisfied. No doubt I'll also talk with my psychiatrist after the email I sent him about becoming depressed. I've also got to change my bed so I can look forward to clean sheets tonight after I've watched the thriller that's going to be on TV.

I think I'll take some pain medication for my shoulder as it's slowly becoming more sore. Going back to bed and resting it will be good for it. I just won't sleep on my side. It will be a bit tricky to walk the dog today. I'll have to use my other hand to hold the leash. The dog does pull.

I hope you'll all have a good day. It's going to be drizzly here, but not too cold. 

Ciao,

Nora

Rain, rain go away...

Every time I decide to take the dog for a walk, it is raining as it is now. It completely messes up our schedule and we have to wait until it's dry again. There's a cold wind blowing too and I need to wear a scarf and a jacket when we go outside. 

The cold isn't too bad if you're prepared for it. You just have to make sure you're dressed warm enough. The wind whips my hair in all directions and I have to try and fix it when we get home, but I have to fix it after I take a nap too or whenever I sleep on it. 

I'm constantly fixing my hair because it is so short and I thought I was getting a no nonsense haircut. Because it's so fine and it's such flyaway hair, it has a tendency to get stuck in the wrong place very easily. Maybe if it's a little bit longer, it won't be as bad. 

I'm wearing the scarf as a fashion accessory. It is made of cotton and not too warm to keep wearing inside. I picked it to match my clothes and it's one that I washed along with a lot of other items from the coat rack. 

I like the way it feels around my neck. It's just a little bit warmer and more comfortable than having nothing there. I still have the bedroom windows open and it has gotten cooler in the apartment. I don't want to have to close the windows and turn up the thermostat. 

I'd rather dress more warmly and in layers. I do have enough clothes to choose from. That's no problem. 

*

The dog couldn't wait any longer and I had to take him for a walk. It was drizzling and we got a bit wet, but it's a good thing that I took him when I did, because now it's really pouring. It started to come down hard right after we came in.

At least I won't have to go water my sister's garden. Everything should get a good soaking. The timing of the rainy weather was perfect in that sense. I wished for rain and got it. I didn't realize that my wishes came true. I must wish for things more often. I suppose I must make an offering to the rain gods now.

Tonight 'A Touch of Frost' will be on. I'm in the mood for a thriller and it doesn't at all have to be complicated. I want to relax in my bathrobe and have nothing to worry about for a while. Watching a thriller is the perfect way to get my mind off things.

Right, I have to eat dinner, albeit sort of late. Chicken and pasta soup it is. 

Have a good evening.

Ciao,

Nora

Keeping up with myself...

Thank god it's Friday! The domestic help has been here and cleaned up the place and now I get to enjoy the results all in my own company. There is something to be said for that. Being alone in a clean place is sort of like being alone in a temple without an altar, unless you count the computer desk as one. It makes you feel very peaceful and tranquil and you know that for a while everything will stay as uncluttered  and clean as it is. Until you dirty that first ashtray and that first soup bowl and glass for you milk. It's almost a sin to move around in here and I do it reluctantly. 

The fact that it's Friday adds some joy to my life, although I can't for the life of me figure out why it does so much. You'd think I was going on a mini vacation or something. I act like I have something wonderful to look forward to, while all it is is two empty days to do with as I please. And I will do nothing important with them at all. I will sleep late and watch a lot of television and walk the dog and be in my own company. If I'm lucky, I'll read my book. 

My main goal this weekend is to find my equilibrium which I had lost this past week. I think I'm already on my way, because I'm having a relatively peaceful day today. I am aware of the fact that I'm regularly trying to find my balance and that little things influence it and that I have to readjust myself now and then. But slowly and surely I'm becoming more secure of myself and less frightened that I'll not feel stable. I do have to add that I'm finding much relief from my medication and am very much aware when it's working after I've taken it. 

Right now it is the very little things in life that give me the most satisfaction. That's why I'm so happy with my clean apartment. It rained briefly just a while ago and I loved the way the air smelled afterwards. If only someone could bottle that. You would wish for your laundry to smell that way. There's a strong breeze blowing and it has cooled off the apartment by a whole degree. I'm sitting here in my warm gray cardigan with my socks on. To me that is pure bliss. 

I will take a nap in a little while and enjoy the coolness of the dark bedroom under the warmth of the duvet. It will just be a little nap, but it will refresh me for the rest of the day. I find that a nap in the afternoon does me a world of good. It's mostly for the sake of my brain that I take one. It's like pushing the reset button and I always have lots of renewed energy when I wake up, although I do need a cup of coffee to get the cobwebs out of my mind. It's not a perfect system, but it suits me. 

I hope you're all having a good day.

Ciao,

Nora

Working the odds...

I'm drinking coffee to increase the chances that my mood will improve, because coffee generally seems to have a positive influence on how I feel mentally. I'm telling myself that after this second cup, I already feel better but, of course, it could all be a question of mind over matter and a huge illusion. On the other hand, maybe caffeine really does do something for me and it is beneficial to my state of mind. 

At any rate, I feel somewhat capable of writing a post, although I have no idea where it's going yet. I'm in a rambling sort of mood and I don't have a specific subject that I want to discuss, except that I want to say that feeling depressed is not my idea of spending quality time with myself. I have been in much better moods and have enjoyed my own company more. I think you bother yourself the most when you're not doing well emotionally. 

But anyway, like I said, the coffee seems to have put me in a better mood and I think I can handle putting my thoughts down on paper (ha, there's that Freudian slip again).

We're having summer weather in April and lots of pollen is blowing through the sunny sky. I don't seem to be in the least bothered by it, so apparently nothing is blooming that I'm allergic too or I'm not allergic at all. I'll just assume that I'm not. It will simplify my life tremendously if I'm not and I would probably have eczema anyway. All those allergy tests I had in the States may have been false positive. I'm also supposed to be allergic to dogs and cats.

The temperatures have been very pleasant and warm and I now have all the windows open on a crack. That means the apartment can air out properly and that some of the warmer air gets inside too, slowly but surely. It is still cooler inside than it is outside. I'd rather keep it that way, but I know that by this summer it won't be. I'll have to try and keep the sun from shining through the living room windows as much as possible. That means keeping the shades drawn for the most part.

It was almost too warm to walk the dog at noon, especially when we were between buildings and out of the breeze. You can tell that I'm not used to this kind of warm weather anymore, nor is the dog. He will have to be trimmed soon because now his fur is too thick and hot. We both laid down in the cool bedroom when we came back and took a nap. It was very pleasant. I'm lucky that the sun only shines on the back of the apartment very briefly in the morning. 

Oh, I see that it's almost time to watch the 6 o'clock news. I will keep this short. I do want to know what has happened in the country and the world. 

I hope you all had a good day.

Ciao,

Nora

Where was I?

I've put the radio/CD player back in the bedroom. I decided that I missed it too much at night when I went to bed. It was too silent when I was laying there waiting to fall asleep. I thought that maybe it was too much of a stimulus, but I was wrong. The radio keeps me company and I fall asleep with it on easily. It distracts me and keeps me from thinking complicated thoughts. That's very important. 

I'm not here by myself in the living room. The domestic help is washing the windows. She does a very good job at them, better than I could. She knows how to wash them without getting streaks. That's why she is the domestic help. She's got a lot of experience. Tyke is watching her do her work. He likes her very much and is always very interested in what she does.

It's noontime and I've just taken my medicines, all except my afternoon anti-psychotic tablet. I'm not supposed to take that now. This is in an effort to further reduce them. I think I'm doing okay, except that I'm a little bit grumpy. It's not such a horrible thing to be grumpy, of course, and I'm sure I'll get over it. I don't think that it's anything important. I'll mention it to my psychiatrist when he calls me later. I mustn't make a mountain out of a molehill.

My psychiatrist just called me and I told him that I was a bit grumpy. He asked me if I thought it was a sign that I was entering a different mood. I told him that I didn't think so and that I really wasn't too worried. I don't think that I'm going to get hypo-manic or depressed right now. At least, I assume I won't. He wants me to reduce my anti-depressives also starting today. We're doing this very carefully and I'm seeing him next week. It's good to have the extra control while I do this.

I shouldn't really worry about a thing and just assume that all will be well. I'm tougher than the absence of a pill anyway. I will not be defeated. 

It has started to rain again and as far as I can see, the street is completely clear of snow and ice. What a relief that is. It had stopped being fun quite some time ago. Now the river is very full and almost at the highest level. All sorts of precautions are beings taken. There's a lot of melt water from upstream that is finding its way into it from Belgium and France, but also from the smaller rivers here. Some land is being allowed to flood, it is designated for that. That's better than having some of the villages flood. 

It's 11 degrees Celsius (50F), that's quite warm for us. I have the bedroom windows open to air out the apartment. I had to go sit in my bedroom with the animals while the domestic help vacuumed the front of the apartment and mopped it. Neither Tyke nor Gandhi likes the vacuum cleaner and we don't want them walking on the wet floors. They do leave behind paw prints. That's really not that awful, but I pretend it is for the sake of the domestic help. 

I'm done being grumpy now and feel quite alright. I'm ready for the remainder of this Friday. I don't know what I'm going to do with it yet, but I'm sure I'll find some way to stay out of trouble. I usually do. I just mustn't show any kind of extreme behavior. I mustn't be too happy or too sad. That's a tall order. I think I'm up to it, though. I took a little nap on the sofa this morning and would be more than happy to take another one, but I think I'll go watch the speed skating championships on television. 

Have a nice day!

Ciao,

Nora

Culture...

I got up early this morning and was full of good intentions. I didn't want to act like it was another weekend day and waste it sitting around in my bathrobe, not accomplishing anything. The first thing I did early this morning was walk Tyke when it was still dark outside and cold. It was even snowing a little bit. Luckily, Tyke cooperated and got his business over and done with quickly, so we could return to the warm apartment soon. I did let him sniff around on the field for a while, but it was too cold to linger long. 

Once we got back inside the apartment, I realized that I was still a bit sleepy and I laid down on the sofa under the red fleece blanket and closed my eyes for a while. I had planned to watch the cultural programs that were going to be on that morning, so I had turned on the television, but all I saw were 5 minutes of news and then I fell asleep and didn't wake up until noontime, so I slept for a long time. 

I immediately made myself a cup of coffee, and then another one, so that I would be alert and well and then I took Tyke for another walk. It was a bit less cold outside and the sun was shining. Still, there was a lot of ice underneath the freshly fallen snow and walking was a bit treacherous, even in my new boots. I certainly mustn't get a false sense of security, because I can still slip and fall. 

After I took Tyke home, I walked to the tobacco shop very carefully, although in some places people had cleaned their sidewalks really well. They had sprinkled them with salt and gotten rid of all the ice. I slipped a few times, but managed to find my footing anyway, so they were just close calls. 

I bought a chocolate bar at the tobacco shop along with my usual supplies and made my way home, aware now of the treacherous places and avoiding them as much as possible. Tyke and Gandhi came to greet me both when I walked in the front door and you would have thought that I'd been gone for hours. It does feel good to be welcomed so, although Tyke was also very curious about what was in the bag that I was carrying. I didn't give him a chance to look, afraid that he'd find the chocolate bar.

I watched television all afternoon. Some of it was interesting and some of it was inane. At least I was dressed and I wasn't sitting around in my bathrobe. That was one redeeming feature. At least it wasn't a day like last Saturday that I let completely go to waste. I do feel that I did something useful. 

I'm waiting for it to start snowing again, because it is supposed to. I'll go walk Tyke in the snow. The country has been in chaos because of the snow and the ice. Planes, trains and automobiles have been delayed or canceled or stuck in traffic jams. People are told not to go anywhere unless they absolutely have to. There's a terrible mess at Schiphol Airport and many passengers are stranded. 

I must go and watch the latest news. 

Have a good evening.

Ciao,

Nora

On a Sunday afternoon...

Even though I slept for a long, long time, I had to make a pot of coffee, because I was getting so sleepy that I was getting ready to lie down on the sofa for a nap. I didn't want to spend a whole afternoon sleeping, though, therefor I made the coffee and I just drank a cup of it. It is so strong, that it is waking me up already, although I won't jubilate too soon and better wait for what the second cup will do to me. 

I don't know why I thought I could do without a cup of coffee when I woke up. I actually did without for more than three hours and in that time I also let Tyke out. Am I a silly woman, or what? I didn't even have a glass of juice to compensate, nor a glass of milk. I sat here with my cigarettes and acted like I didn't know what I was doing. Maybe I didn't for a while. I have been know for my absentia.

Now Tyke is expecting me to play with him and the ball and his rawhide bone at the same time that I type this, so I am slightly distracted. I throw the ball and he brings it back, but he won't let go of it. I'm supposed to get it away from him. He finally lets go of it if he gets too frustrated with me. That's when I ignore him, tired as I get from trying to get it away from him without success. It's basically an exercise in mutual frustration. 

When we went out for a walk, we met the Yorkshire Terrier puppy and I let Tyke off the leash so he could play with it. He had a very good time running around with it. Tyke towers above that puppy, but he thinks he's still one himself, so it's lots of fun watching them play. That little puppy is fast and runs underneath Tyke and jumps around him like a rubber ball bouncing. It's good for Tyke to try to keep up. It wears him out. 

It's a colder and overcast day today. It's already on the dark side in the living room and I really ought to have the lights turned on. I'm sitting by the light of the desk lamp. There are kids playing outside, so that does create some liveliness. Otherwise it would be a dull day. I am doing alright today, though, compared to yesterday when I was not doing well at all. Yesterday was also my daughter's birthday, so I'm sure that contributed to my feeling bad. 

Oh, it has just started to rain outside, that must be why it is so dark in here. It is because of the rain clouds. We are nice and cozy inside here and don't have a thing to worry about. I don't mind the rain as long as I'm inside and I don't have to go out in it. It's a different matter altogether if I have to go out on my bike. It's better to walk places under my umbrella if it is at all possible.

Yesterday afternoon the sun was shining, but I was not in the proper mood to enjoy it. As far as I'm concerned it was a wasted day and not one worth repeating. Days like that are so unnecessary and I don't think I learn anything from them either. They are a complete waste of effort and emotion. 

Thank goodness there are Sundays on which you can recuperate from Saturdays. You can sleep a lot, which is usually what you need, and you can take your time and do whatever is right for you at the moment. 

I like to be a bit unstructured, because it's the only day on which I allow myself that. I sleep more, as if I have to catch up on that. It's the one day on which I don't worry all too much about how I'm dressed. I take a break from that. I just wear whatever is lying in my rattan chair. I don't worry about my hair and how it's fixed and if it's good enough. In other words, it's a real day off. 

The coffee has completely cleared my mind of cobwebs and I'm not sleepy anymore, although I am looking forward to going to sleep tonight. That's just the coziness of getting into my pajamas and under the duvet. A person can look forward to that very much. I still have the windows open at the top and it's still not very cold in here. It's 46F outside, but for some reason the apartment stays warmer. 

I hope you're all having a nice Sunday. 

Ciao,
Nora

Too normal...

I'm so incredibly normal, that I suspect that I took a dose too many of one of my medications today. I can't be sure, but I strongly suspect it. Of course, there's nothing I can do to undo it, so I just have to live with it. Isn't that awful, living with being too normal?

To offset it, I've made myself a pot of coffee and I'm having the first cup now. The pot has been hand washed by the domestic help herself, and hand dried by me, as was the rest of the paraphernalia, so I'm drinking a clean cup of coffee. As if there's any other kind to have. Right? 

I didn't sleep last night and didn't go to bed until early in the morning. I woke up just before the Exfactor got here and had just made coffee. I was still coughing from my first cigarette and walking around in my bathrobe. Tyke was the first one to hear the Exfactor's motorcycle from a distance and he ran to the window to have a look and then ran to the front door to get ready to greet him. He is so enthused when he knows the Exfactor is coming. 

The Exfactor went to the store for me to pick up a few things I had run out of, but later I realized that there were more things I needed, so I will have to go there myself tomorrow. The domestic help discovered that several cleaning products were gone and those replacement girls had not told me they were. Bad show all around. I will also have to get more dog food, because Tyke is eating a lot right now and I'm running out. 

The Exfactor and I did have a chance to drink coffee and talk about his work and I got him to off load a bit about what sort of stress he was dealing with. It turns out that a lot of it is still unresolved stress from his old job and we talked about that. I'm trying to get him to lighten the load by talking about it. I hope it will help. I will keep doing this. I figure I get a chance to do it once a week, so he should get a chance to do it also. All he needs is a listening ear and a little bit of guidance. I think I'm qualified to provide those.

It's 57F outside and I have all the windows open at the top. It isn't cold in here, but there's enough of a draft to air out the apartment, which was necessary. I will keep them open as long as possible. I don't need to turn the heater on now anyway. It is going to get colder over the weekend, so I will have to see what I'm going to do then, but I hope I can leave them open, because I gets smelly in here from the smoke. It's nicer to lie in bed with the windows open at night too, although I wouldn't know a thing about that, of course, not sleeping at night as I do. 

I am happy that it is weekend again and all I have to do is some paperwork that's not going to take a lot of my time. I'll try to get it done tomorrow and walk to the mailbox with Tyke. I also have to get my flu shot tomorrow morning. I'll be busy in the morning then it looks like. I do like to get things out of the way, as long as I'm not sleeping that is. I do waste a lot of my day sleeping when I stay up all night. I wonder if that is part of the purpose? To avoid the day? 

I washed a big load of laundry today and I still have to hang it up to dry. It is raining outside and it will be this weekend. The laundry will have to dry inside. I don't mind because it makes the bathroom smell good. It does help if I take it down and put it away on time. The laundry that's on the drying rack now has been there forever. Sometimes I do lie down on the job. I get some things done perfectly and other things slip through the cracks. It's hard being perfect. Who do I think I am anyway? 

I must go and walk Tyke. He has had a big meal and I'm sure it is necessary that he goes outside. I don't think the patio will do. I've had enough coffee and I think I will switch to cold milk. I will have to buy more tomorrow. 

Have a good night, all of you!

Ciao,

Nora

Rites of passage.

It's officially Saturday, although you can't really speak of morning yet. It's still in the middle of the night, but by the time I finish writing this, it will be so close to dawn that it will be almost morning. I'm glad that it's officially Saturday, because I feel that I can go back to bed at any time and sleep until I'm done sleeping and ready to get up again, although it may not actually take me that long.

Since I've quit smoking, I've started taking short naps during the day and they help me get through the occasional craving I may have for a cigarette, so I'm never really super tired and I'm done sleeping quickly. I also spend a lot of time reading to take my mind of cigarettes, so I don't exactly get exhausted from physical activity. Reading is my main activity and it works very well to keep me occupied, but it's not very tiring.

I think I take naps to relieve my mind of the thoughts of smoking and because it's a distraction to lie in bed and listen to the radio and doze off for a short time. I just as easily get up again and move to my armchair to continue reading.

I think the period of quitting smoking is a huge time out from regular life and it is a period during which nothing is quite as normal as it usually is. It is a time of coping and waiting. You wait for your body to forget the actual habit of cigarette smoking. I still have the tendency to want to light up a cigarette and I'm waiting for that to dissipate and disappear altogether. I don't want that to be part of my second nature anymore. I don't want it to be an automatic reaction to any given situation, innocent as it is, rewarding as it might have been.

I know that in time my body and my mind will forget about this habit and it will not be second nature anymore. I will get used to not subconsciously wanting to reach for a cigarette and my lighter. I can already drink a cup of coffee without associating it with the need to smoke. Which is good, because I need my cups of coffee.

Every once in a while, though, a very strong urge to smoke hits me and I'm ready to go to my neighbor and beg for a cigarette. Pride and a dislike for my neighbor withhold me from doing so. They are nosy enough as it is. Besides, that would be one cigarette and I would still have to do without the rest of the time and it wouldn't help me one bit. It would just be a very temporary satisfaction.

I finished reading 'When We Were Orphans' last night and was very much impressed with it. The ending was especially exciting and very surprising and not at all what I was expecting. It was such a well written book and so very much believable that you started to think it had really happened, but of course it was impossible, but it is the hallmark of a great book and I wonder about the author's research for it. This is the kind of novel that will stay in my memory for a long time.

I started reading 'Man Walks Into Room' by Nicole Krauss. I've read this book before, but it was in a muddled past and I have forgotten nearly all of it, so it's like reading a new book. I'm looking forward very much to finishing it, because I remember enjoying it very much before and being impressed with it and I will read it all day today, unless I get distracted by the television. There are some cultural programs on this morning, so maybe...

My apartment is very clean, as the domestic help was here yesterday and it also seems to stay cleaner since I've quit smoking. There's less dust and no ashes and tobacco and the whole place looks better. I told the domestic help that whatever she cleaned well now would stay clean and there would not be that brown film on everything. She's been cleaning with ammoniac to get that off everything. She's a smoker herself and that's how she cleans at home. The one that comes on Monday also did a good job and that's the day I quit, so it made a difference from that day onward.

I think I will go back to bed for a little while and listen to the radio and see if I have any sleep left in me. I will find out soon enough if I'm done sleeping and if I should start the day officially now. According to Tyke it's not time yet, because he's sound asleep on the sofa. Gandhi is sound asleep in the armchair. It's still early in the morning and I haven't heard a sound yet outside. It's even too early for the paper delivery person.

I hope you all have a good day.

Ciao,
Nora

Completely...

It's in the middle of the night and I'm completely wide awake, smoking the last of my cigarettes until I go to the pharmacy first thing in the morning to pick up my nicotine patches. When I first got up I was miserable and grumpy and out of sorts and chain smoking, until I had my cup of coffee and then I was okay and a more reasonable human being. Coffee does set me to rights and I can never do without it. It's like a medicine to me. I sorts out my brain. I'm convinced of the healing powers of caffeine in my case. I don't know what it does for you, but for me it is a very positive experience.

I read blogs, which I was behind on, and left comments on most of them. Some of them I had not read in three days, so I was shamefully behind. I had not been in the proper mood and could not bring myself to read them, let alone comment on them. I am caught up now and can relax again. I feel I've had my enjoyment and done my duty. I read some blogs that I hardly ever comment on, because I feel a little bit like a stranger there, but I'm a faithful follower. I hope the fact that I show up counts for enough.

I had not planned to stay up, but now that I am, I am going to make the most of it and enjoy myself. I'm in such a good mood now that I want to take advantage of that and let the situation last as long as possible. I'm not going to spoil it by going to bed. There's not a hair on my head that's thinking about it anyway. I'm too excited to go to bed just now.

I do have very interesting dreams when I sleep and I wonder how much they are influenced by what I hear on the radio while I'm asleep. I have elements in my dreams that were not there before, so I'm sure they are coming from outside, but I give my own twist to them and incorporate them into my own fantasies. Music is part of it and I do dream about that regularly, but have people play it whom I know very well. Or have them sing songs. Still, although I listen to a Dutch radio station, all my dreams take place in the English language, of that I'm sure, and I find that interesting. My dreams are all very dramatic and look like large screen movie productions with special effects and a music score and everything. Like a filmed opera, I suppose. There's wailing going on too, sometimes. Lord only knows what I listen to at night.

I talked to my sister yesterday and she told me that her party went on until 2:30 in the morning. Can you imagine lasting that long? I would have called it quits by midnight. I'm so obviously not a party animal and my sister so obviously is. She always has a lot of fun in a crowd of people. I do better in small intimate groups. She's a very outgoing person, a real extrovert and shares herself with anyone and everybody. I'm more introverted and private and share myself sparingly. Except on my blog, that's the exception. I share myself here because I can be contemplative and choose my words carefully and show what I want to show, although I'm not that secretive about myself. For the most part, I'm pretty open and tell it like it is in a mostly rational way.

For the past few days I've felt a bit down and I thought that maybe I was getting depressed, but it seems to have lifted now and I feel better. I suppose those are just the natural cycles that people go through that I have to get used to. Not every mood has to have a significant meaning, except for the last one I had, which was distinctly hypomanic and could have gotten me into a lot of trouble. As it is, the damage was relatively small and I didn't do anything too crazy, except for buying a new sofa and coffee table and area rug. That's still within reason, just about. I'm going to pay them off with the money I save on the tobacco I won't be buying anymore. That adds up to a large amount of money.

I'm afraid of the black dog that's always stalking me in the background, but maybe he will stay in the background this season. I've had years when he didn't appear at all, and maybe this will be one of them. I'm as prepared as I can be and have all systems in place. I know I can count on the light therapy lamp to elevate my mood, there's no doubt about that. It's a shame that I had lost faith in it and didn't use it last year. It would have saved me a lot of bother.

Yesterday afternoon I didn't have an Internet connection. I reset the modem four times, unsuccessfully. I finally called the help desk and they talked me through the procedure and it turned out in the end that the cable in the hard drive wasn't plugged in properly. Duh! I think Tyke must have pulled it loose when he went to retrieve his ball. It sure puzzled me and I hadn't thought of that solution, but I will from now on. It will be the first place I look if and when it happens again. You learn a new lesson every day. It makes you appear a little dumb, but I don't care about that. Let them think what they want, as long as I have my connection back.

Well, I'm going to enjoy the last hours of my smoking life. I have to stock up on some air freshener and Febrèze. I'm going to treat the whole apartment and do lots of laundry. I will have the place smelling good in no time.

Have a good day!

Ciao,
Nora

Is that lucky or what?

I did go back to sleep in the middle of the night when I told you that I was maybe going to do all sorts of jobs and I thought was too wide awake to go back to bed. I slept until 7 o'clock and got dressed immediately. I was a little dopey, but a cup of coffee helped me get over that. Coffee always works and always gets my mind up to the proper speed. What would I do without it?

Promptly, at 8 o'clock, a big truck pulled up outside and I locked Tyke in the spare bedroom and went to open up the front door and the outside door. The first thing that was carried in was the new coffee table, which came in a flat pack and which I would have to assemble myself. Then the delivery men started to carry in the sofa, but soon ran into trouble, because the space by the front door in the hallway turned out to be to narrow to let the long sofa in. I had not realized when I ordered it that it was over sized. Those guys tried every trick, but they could not get it inside, so they had to take it back and told me that I would have to order a shorter sofa.

I did that and it turns out that the sofa I ordered now is nicer than the sofa I ordered first. I think this one escaped my attention, because I was not looking for size, but for a three seater. This time I looked for size and got different choices. It will be here next Wednesday and until that time I will have to do without a sofa, but that is really no problem. There are worse things in life.

Then I opened the flat pack and saw what I had to deal with and the fact that there were about 100 screws that needed to be screwed in and I decided that it was not a job for me. I don't have an electric screwdriver. I called the Exfactor and he will be over tomorrow with his and put the coffee table together. I'm ever so grateful and until that time, the flat pack has been closed up again. Tyke lies on top of it with his ball and thinks he's the king of the living room.

I took a break and thought about things and then switched the armchairs around so that the barrel chair, which has comfortable armrests, is by the reading light and I can sit in it when I read my book. That way I don't have to lug a pillow around every time I sit down to read. I've put the extra pillows on my bed with pillow cases on them and they will come in handy when I want to lie down on the sofa, which has low armrests. They should be very good to sleep on.

Then I cleaned up and rearranged the bookcase and made space for more books by getting rid of obsolete things and moving reference books to the bedroom. That went a lot easier and faster than I had anticipated. I still have to move two boxes that are sitting on top of it. I had quite forgotten about them and am running out of space to put things. There's only so much room in the apartment. The bookcase looks much better now and that shows you what a short amount of hard work can do for you. I wasn't even out of breath.

I'm still going to do a load of laundry next and change my bed, so going to sleep tonight will be fun, although it really is every night, but I will wear clean pajamas too. That's something to look forward to. I think you must have these little points of light to aim for in your day every day. The smallest things count. Like having a glass of cold milk and a peanut butter sandwich or getting your mail out of the mailbox and finding a package there that you were expecting. It's all about anticipation and enjoyment.

I'm now going off to enjoy my chores. Have a nice day.

Ciao,
Nora

Don't fear the rain clouds overhead...

I'm eating some fruity gumdrops that I bought at the tobacconist a while ago. I couldn't resist the temptation and bought a big bag of them. They satisfy my taste buds and my stomach very much. The problem is that they fill me up very quickly and that they prevent me from eating anything else, so for now I'm living on candy, which is not a preferable lifestyle. Sometimes I have to throw caution to the wind and live with complete abandonment. I like living dangerously and on the edge. I'm so adventurous!

I had to get two new lighters at the tobacconist, because Tyke had eaten one that I had and the other one was almost out of fuel. All I got after many attempts was one tiny little flame, and speaking of living on the edge, that was just a little bit too scary for me. I didn't know if I could light my next cigarette and the matches that I have are absolutely no good. They are as ineffective as a 120 year old man is in bed. They're not like those Swedish matches that work anytime and anywhere. Swedish men probably do too.

I also had to get trash bags and the tobacconist is very handy, because he stocks those. I was using a plastic bag, but it was getting full and I do like the fact that I don't have to go all the way to the grocery store to get new trash bags. There's nothing worse than standing in line for those. Never mind the fact that I don't like riding my bike across the parking lot there, because you take your life in your own hands when you do. This is because of the drivers of cars who don't count on you being there and have a strong desire to run you over and probably wouldn't stop if they did.

I checked my mail on the way back in and found another book from Bookmooch and that makes the total 4 received with 7 left to come. This book I just got looks very interesting and I can't wait to start it. I think I will sit in the armchair this afternoon and start reading it. I will install myself with a cup of tea and my cigarettes and have a good old read. The book is called Drowning Ruth by Christina Schwarz. It was a #1 New York Times bestseller when it came out 10 years ago. I have a good feeling about this book, call it expectations or instincts, I think I will like it. I look forward to an afternoon of reading to calm my mind. I'm quite excited about nothing at all and everything in general and need a soothing activity. I haven't finished A Place Of Hiding, but I will save that as my nighttime book or finish it when I'm done with this one.

I had the domestic help here and she had some spare time and cleaned the whole bookcase. I'm glad it was done and thanked her profusely. All the dust is gone and she moved all the books out of the way to do it. She is a peach. She also cleaned the CD rack and that was above and beyond the call of duty. I do so appreciate the help. It makes living so much easier. I can keep up with things myself now and take care of the chores that I need to do. Everything is manageable now and I don't feel like the apartment is tumbling down around me.

Actually, everything is starting to look more manageable now that I'm on a lower dose of antidepressants. I feel that I have more mental energy, but that may also be due to the light therapy lamp. I do want to continue decreasing the amount of antidepressants and will discuss that with my psychiatrist when I see him next. I didn't know that it was possible without too many problems or I would have done it sooner. Well, there's always a perfect time to find these things out, I guess now is that time.

It has started to rain again, but we are assured that the weather will get better in the very near future and the meteorologists advised us to go to England for a short vacation, because the weather is so nice there. You lucky English people. There's been damage across the country here because of the storm. We've had so much rain and wind lately. The Netherlands is living up to its image of being a cold and wet country. In two more days it's going to be September and I'm counting on an Indian summer. Oh no, now it's started to thunder too. I'm glad I'm not out there.

I think I will go and read my novel now. It's time for some food for my brain. I haven't read a book that's not a thriller in a while. It will be nice to not read about dead bodies, although there is a mysterious death in this book too. All will be revealed in time.

Have a good day. Think of me here in the rain. Not that I mind...

Ciao,
Nora

Music Box.

I was lying in bed last night in the semi dark, not reading my book, and I thought what I really needed was a radio/CD player so that I could listen to softly turned down music to fall asleep by. I have enough CD's of music that I like well enough and also some of nature sounds that would be very soothing to listen to and I could order others. Then there are also radio stations that may be interesting to listen to and fall asleep to if I have the sound turned down low. It would quietly occupy my mind as a drift off to sleep.

This is not a completely original idea, because Maggie May listens to the radio every night as she goes to sleep. I think she listens to talk radio and the soothing sound of the voices helps her fall asleep. That sounds very attractive. I'm not always in the mood to read my book. Sometimes I'm too tired to and just want to lie there by the light of the night light in the almost dark. The problem is keeping your mind occupied and keeping your thoughts from straying. Music would prevent that from happening.

I ordered a radio/CD player on line that was not too expensive and it will be here tomorrow. I can put it on the bookshelf beside my bed and have it within easy reach and keep some CD's there as well. I'm looking forward to it. Especially the radio part as I haven't listened to the radio in more than 2 years and am completely out of touch with the programming.

I did fall asleep on my own last night without any help and slept well until a decent time this morning. I didn't have any night sweats for a change and maybe that is because it's so much cooler in the apartment. I always have to wear my bathrobe in the morning now and it's no luxury. This comes from a person who likes to be cool in temperature. I like to be cool too in the popular sense of the word, but that's another thing altogether. I don't know if it's possible to be cool at my age. I haven't been accused of it in quite a while.

I'm having a very good cup of coffee and am enjoying my cigarette. I do very much like these early hours of the morning before life has properly started. The trash people haven't even come by yet. I say people, but they are men, I haven't seen a woman on the trash truck yet. Not that men aren't people. I'm not so unkind as to deny them that privilege.

It's stopped raining and the sky is now merely cloudy, but it is cold outside. I will have to dress warm when I walk Tyke in a little while. I'll have to go find something with long sleeves to wear. That will be fun to do. I'll take a dive in my closet and see what I can come up with. It's been a while since I've worn my long sleeve stuff, except for my one cardigan. I do like it when it's chilly and I get to wear different clothes for a change. I like layers, so that's probably the best choice, although a sweater may be nice too.

I'm not closing the windows yet. It has to get colder inside before I do that. I do want to keep airing out the apartment as long as I can because I smoke. It does get smelly in here if I don't. I'm going to try and postpone turning on the heater as long as possible. This climate is not made for sissies. You just have to put on more clothes. Or own a fireplace.

Right, I'm getting the show on the road. The great outdoors calls. Ha, I wish it did. I would be very happy with a country lane now, although it would probably be awfully muddy now, so maybe it is better to stick to the sidewalk. I don't own any galoshes. I'm a city woman.

Have a great day!

Ciao,
Nora