The weekend

I was sitting here minding my own business when I noticed that I was getting just a little bit stressed and I wondered why that was. I quickly realized it was because in my head I was making a list of things I had not gotten around to doing and that I absolutely could not forget. But then I also realized that this was the weekend and that I would have plenty of time to do them, so I started to relax again. 

It's just a matter of writing these things down on a piece of paper and breaking them down into simple steps. The smaller the steps, the easier the job and the less intimidated I will be. It's the fear of failure that always paralyzes me and that has to do with my drive for perfectionism. It's better if I name those less appealing characteristics so I won't be bothered by them so much. It's good to keep them in mind while I go about crossing off items on that yet to be made list.

I'm sitting here having a much appreciated cup of coffee. It's as good as I anticipated it would be. Since I'm off the tranquilizers, I don't have many befuddled moments anymore and I seldom have to drink the coffee to become sober minded. I do require it in the mornings to get my head together. I could not start functioning without the caffeine. I suppose that's how addicted I am to it. Like the joke goes: I don't have an identifiable personality without it. And I'm an unmovable, silent obstacle without caffeine. 

The Exfactor can testify to that. He is here some mornings when I'm just waking up and haven't had my coffee yet. He knows that I'm incapable of having a conversation until I've had that first cup. I sit there as if I'm dumb struck and I can hardly utter a word. I do completely turn around when the caffeine has hit my system and am full of kindness once that happens. I can talk about any subject then and make a completely coherent shopping list. 

Luckily, the scenario above doesn't happen a lot. I do try to be up on time when I know the Exfactor is coming. I very seldom oversleep. That must be why I like the weekends because it allows me that luxury, although I don't often take advantage of it. I must remember that I like the weekends for those times when I think I don't.

Ciao,

Irene

The perfect blog post...

It's better to pretend to act like you know what the ingredients are to a perfect blog post and then to go ahead and try to write one. I have sat here quite a few times and tried to figure it out, but I've not come up with an answer yet. At least not with one that works for me, although I am aware of the fact how some other people do it. 

I'll just keep plodding along in my own peculiar way and make the best of it. I keep telling myself that it's also for my own sake that I write these posts because they act like a diary for me and in it I record my life. Maybe some people will find it interesting enough to also read. I can't figure it out from the statistics. They are a mystery to me. 

I got woken up by the dog who, in an effort to get my attention, licked my face all over because he had to go out and he was in a hurry. I stood by the back door in the very cool air and looked at the stars in the clear night sky. I appreciated the sight of them and the fact that there were no clouds to hide them. Of course, that's what made it so nice and crisp outside. 

The dog came in just when I was sufficiently cooled down and I made my way to the kitchen to make some coffee. I'm always amazed at how quickly the machine turns out a pot. While I waited, I turned on the computer and checked my emails of which there were only a few. At least I don't get spam, which is a huge relief. It can make your in box look very full for naught. 

I can sleep late in the morning, though I haven't done so lately because I don't take the tranquilizers any more at night. It's made a big difference in how early I get up and how well I do that first hour. I'm not in a comatose condition that I have to recuperate from with several cups of coffee. I'm in a functioning state pretty quickly. 

I always made the assumption that I was an especially slow starter, but now I turn out to not really be one. Neither am I flying high during the night. I'm completely sober during these hours that I'm up and I distinctly remember being not so. 

I've got to think about which clothes I'm going to wear today, although over everything I wear my warm, gray, oversized cardigan when I'm inside. That's because the windows are still open and I won't turn on the heater yet. I also wear one of my cotton scarfs to keep the draft off my neck. I do like to be toasty warm. I dread the thought of winter. 

There, I wrote this post strictly for my own sake. Well, I did keep you readers in mind a little bit. 

It's time for me to go back to my warm bed. I've got to sleep just a little while longer. 

Have a great day.

Ciao,

Nora