Properly tuned in.

Right now I could eat a horse, although I don't believe in eating them, but that is how much I feel like stuffing my face. It is only a temporary condition brought on by the hour of the night and the fact that I am slightly woozy and not quite in my right mind. I am like someone who smoked a joint and now wants to eat the contents of the refrigerator. You know how those cravings go; I will be over it as soon as I've had another cup of coffee. And maybe I will eat some bread and butter. I could eat a bowl of pea soup with that too.

 

Oh, let's get my mind off food and talk about something else. I do have a tendency to get stuck on one subject once I am in the mood for it. I really wanted to talk about being peaceful some of the time and especially right now, but I think right now doesn't count because it is how I do during the day that's important.

 

In the morning, after I got up, it was like my mind was on speed and I thought that it was a sign of how the rest of my day was going to be, which worried me and I predicted chaos. I wanted to step out of my own head and walk away from it, but took Tyke for a walk instead, hoping that would settle me down. When I got home, all my synapses were still firing at full speed and I sat down in a bit of disgust with a cup of coffee and gave myself over to the process.

 

When I started to despair, it was like a switch was flipped in my mind, and a peaceful feeling settled over me. That meant it had taken my medication a full hour and a half to start working and I always assumed that it did after only a half hour or so, but I had never been that attentive to it. It is a good thing to know for future reference and to never think I completely have my act together before that time. I want to write myself a big reminder on a plasticized 8 by 10 that says: 'Remember to wait for your medication to work!'  

 

Speaking of food, by the way, I have just lost 4 kilos by not eating any fat or sugar and I intent to lose 6 more. It should be a piece of cake, but I won't be eating it. I am eating a lot of whole grain products and taking my vitamins.