Bullocks?

For some reason, I find myself up very early in the morning and, although I'm putting it off, I'm going to have to make myself a pot of coffee. I've already had to take my medicines because I felt that I was not functioning well without them, so I'm waiting for them to start working now. Soon I will be all sorted out and I will be like a newly reborn person. 

If you get all the ingredients right in the morning, nothing will stand in the way of a good day, right? That's my brand of magical thinking. If I follow all the rituals, it's bound to turn out alright. So you see, I'm actually a very animistic person and should have been born in a more primitive society. I could have been the shaman. 

I don't know why I'm up so early in the morning and if I'm going back to bed in a while. There's no reason for me to be up already. It's not like there is a mess of chores waiting for me to do. It's not even dawn yet. I do have to say that I'm in an excellent mood, but that may be a temporary condition. I'll take advantage of it while it lasts. I never know if these things are going to stay with me all day. I'm as changeable as the Dutch weather.

Well, lets just assume for one day that I'm not and throw the whole myth overboard. Let's assume that my mood can be steady just like anybody else's. It's not necessary to move from one extreme to the other. I can just resolve to stay in this mood. And why not, why should it suddenly be any different? Is it because a butterfly flapped its wings somewhere in China?Is it as mysterious as that? 

I'm overly sensitive to the slightest nuances in my environment. I'm too much aware of them. I have to develop a little bit of a thicker skin and not get off kilter so easily. Hopefully that's not too late at my age. I can't live in a sterile bubble. 

I've decided that I'm going back to bed for a while. There's nothing to keep me up yet. It's too early to start the day and there's no need to rush anything. The chores can all wait until later and it will be too noisy to turn the washing machine on now.

I'll take my cheerfulness to bed with me and hope I wake up with it too. Let's just assume that I will. Always assume the best scenario, right?

Have a great day!

Ciao,

Nora